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“Jack—”

“No, you don’t get it You don’t knohat I did to her I killed her, Alex I fucking killed her!”

“What do you mean, you killed her?” Alex asked He sounded confused “And where are you?”

“What does it matter where I am?” I replied

“Just tell me where you are,” repeated Alex calmly

“I’m at the lake house,” I said softly I picked up a stone froround beside h the stillness of the water echoed

“The lake house?” Alex repeated, as if he’d forgotten about it, or blocked it fro”

“I cheated on her I cheated on her with Lisbeth,” I

“Jack, you told me that already, remember? After it happened, you called me You also said you stopped it, remember?” Alex asked I shookblur I was having trouble separating hts from reality

“It doesn’tmatters anymore If she had never ht now If I hadn’t cheated on her, then she wouldn’t have left and she wouldn’t be dead right now,” I cried

Pain tore through my stoh they were being ripped to shreds I gripped h the pain I deserved to hurt

“I have to go,” I said nu up the phone My body shivered, begging for warmth I didn’t deserve to be warm I deserved to suffer, just like I made her suffer

How long had she been in the car before she died? What if they rong? What if she hadn’t been killed instantly? How could they tell twelve hours later that she’d died on impact?

I pulledas bile pooled insideliquid from mynaked by the water’s edge Slowly, I began to wade into the freezing lake This is what I deserved I needed to be punished, but the probleh to undo the dae that I had done

“Fuck!” I yelled at the top of s as the waterI knew that, but I didn’t give a fuck With a little bit of luck I would get pulled under by one of the many potholes and drown