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I looked out at the sea

"I haven't given him any other impression about myself than what I am," I said

"Well then, either he's accepted that or he's deluding hie you," Nelson said I s back to him

"You don't think I can change?"

"No Actually, I'e," he said and held his eyes on ain

I wanted to say I had thought he was co back here to see ht to pursue nation with Belinda in our boathouse I wanted to say I thought he was a better man than that, but I didn't I sirets and disappointments like so much stomach acid

"Your father's lucky to have a daughter like you, especially now," he continued "You're going to hold your fa person"

"Too strong for you?" I dared ask

He smiled

"No I'm too frivolous a person for you We would probably end up killing each other," he joked

"Yes," I said, cloaking my disappointment in a smile He took another sip of his bourbon

"Can I get you anything?"

"No I'et a breath of fresh air All those people, "

"Yes," he said nodding as if he understood, as if he could ever understand "Well, I'll be inside," he added, reached out to touch my hand and then turned and entered the house

I stood there trying to s I felt as if the air around ht, Belinda's dead fetus lay planted like some seed of deformity, a sin pressed down into the darkness in a vain atte That was her strength She could wipe away her yesterdays like she wiped the chalk board at school and start again