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“Yeah, okay,” I said, rollingit covered up the way desire flooded my system

Bellaed ainst the wall

“I figured if I etting cricks in your neck froht cause”

“Oh, so you’re just thinking of yourself then,” I said, rolling ontomyself if I had to look at his stupidly handsome face for another moment ere in such close proximity

“Love, I’ the covers up over the both of us

Then, I shit you not, sliding in behind my body Like… behind-behind With his knees cocked up under mine and my ass nestled in his lap

“Except when I’ about you,” he added, voice a sh my whole body

And outward shiver, too Not one of the private internal ones that could have saved my pride a little bit

He didn’t teaseabout hoords and reement

But he shocked the shit out ofto drift right back off to sleep

Meanwhile I stayed awake for I didn’t even kno long, feeling a mix of uncomfortable and somehow more comfortable than I’d ever been in my life Did that make any sort of sense? Nope But that was how I felt

Uncouess I just never datedto do with me as soon as our clothes were back on

In retrospect, that was a lot sadder than I realized I’d always told myself that hat I wanted as well But ht was possible for me, not actually what I wanted Or it was just uys were not the kids of guys I wanted any connection with outside of sex

But being denied this kind of closeness, this non-sexual intimacy with someone? That was sad

See, I had to place so My mom was never around When she was, she was sick and ry and harsh There had never been any softness or affection in my formative years By the time my aunt and uncle and Nasir ca all that baggage and those issues along with me into my new life