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“So, this ht Not Paul It was no one I knew He worked at the clinic, but I didn’t know that part yet” Another big, deep breath Just keep on breathing “Neither did Riley She was scared The guy took us on one of the paths—they had a whole network of gravel paths through the woods—and alked for what felt like forever”

I can still see the pale pebbles, like sohmyself I can do this

“Riley grabbedto keep her safe” I wipeand innocent she was Big, hazel eyes and pale blond hair She was just a kid

I have to rub ain, and I feel Josh lean toward me I look at the swatch of couch between us

“Finally,this big, white building It was three stories, and it looked like a hotel or…I guess a hospital But it wasn’t” Mills’ eyes widen slightly as I look up at him

“It had been a prison,” I rasp “The whole place…had been a prison Decades before It had big gates and…” I shake ain Miller shifts like hten

“I kneere walking in that it was bad news” Chills pop out onof how stupid I was “Sometimes…in my dreams, we run away and see the chain-link fence with barbed wire on the top” I glance up at him “It’s really there”

I s Set my eyes down on his couch I shouldn’t look up

“There were three floors,” I say, tracing the edge of a cushion “Clinic on the first floor Girls on second And the boys on third”

My eyes flicker up to his on instinct, but I know that if I look at him, I’ll start to lose it more, so I look back down at the couch

“This part’s bad” My voice sounds raspy and weak, even though I try to keep it neutral “What you should reain for half a second, to be sure my point is made “It was bad,” I say “But now it’s over”

Josh nods, his face looking graver now, as if he’s bracing

I blow a breath out, hunch my shoulders, and try to pick out the strands of color in his couch The little blue threads Little gray ones

“We all had our own rooht” I shut ht porn They had feuys, and they would cos, like so-called ‘party drugs’ to ht?” My eyes flicker up to his, and I jerk them back down “I don’t know Fortunately—unfortunately?—it didn’t work for ot hard, in your IV you would get what I called barf juice So your stomach would hurt, and you’d feel pretty sick, and then you wouldn’t get a boner”

I rub ain I wonder what his face looks like, but I’h to look

“It was all fucked up and twisted,” I say, ht if they had those nurses jerk us off enough, we’d all go straight I don’t know if it worked for the other guys, but I think no, because eventually there were a lot of us down on the first floor Meaning” —I glance up, not really seeing him— “in the later part of the day, ould be taken down there fortaken down there”

My eyes slide to Josh’s face, and it looks stricken I can tell he’s trying to look neutral, which h But I don’t I rub ether for a second

“Soh on stuff, and when they took you back to your room from the ‘clinic’ they would run IVs and stuff to cool you down or give you fluids So, the rooms themselves were like a hospital room, almost”

I look up at hi brave for just this one breath, and his eyes are red His face is pale Because he’s normal This stuff would be a shock

“Remember, I’m out now,” I say, at the same time he croaks, “You were scared of hospitals”