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Chapter 17

Chapter 17

I've settled into so routine here at the hotel, and in that way it re hours are filled riting these pages, watching television, trying to irritate the angel, and sneaking off to the bathroom to read the Gospels And I think it's the latter that's sent htmare that leaves ain this fellow talks of a resurrection, of acts beyond the time of my and Joshua's death It's a similar story to that told by the Matthew fellow, the events jumbled somewhat, but basically the story of Joshua'sof the events of that last week of Passover that chills el hasn't been able to keep the secret that Joshua's teachings survived and grew to vast popularity (He's stopped even changing the channel at the mention of Joshua on television, as he did e first arrived) But is this the book fros are drawn? I drea, and loneliness so e, soaked in my oeat, and even after I'ht when I awoke I thought I saoel, his black wings spread and touching the walls of the rooet s around the woone I think I really woke up then, because the angel was lying there on the other bed, staring into the dark, his eyes like black pearls, catching the red blinking aircraft lights that shone dis across the street No wings, no black robe, no wo

"Nightel asked

"Memory," I said Had I been asleep? I re on the cheekbone and the bridge of the nose of the wohtant contours fit into the recesses ofcinnah sweeter than the best day of childhood

Two days after I had walked away, I rang the gong outside the monastery and the little hatch opened to reveal the face of a newly shaven hter in color than that of his face "What?" he said

"The villagers ate our camels," I said

"Go away Your nostrils flare in an unpleasant manner and your soul is somewhat lumpy"

"Joshua, let o"

"I can't just let you in," Josh whispered "You have to wait three days like everyone else" Then loudly, and obviously for someone inside's benefit, he said, "You appear to be infested by Bedouins! Now go away!" And he slammed the hatch

I stood there And waited In a few minutes he opened the hatch

"Infested by Bedouins?" I said

"Givefood and water to last you?"

"Yes, the toothless woman sold me some dried camel meat There was a special"

"That's got to be unclean," said Josh

"Bacon, Joshua, remember?"

"Oh yeah Sorry I'll try to sneak soht away"

"Then Gaspar will let me back in?"

"He was perplexed why you left in the first place He said if anyone needed to learn some discipline, well, you know There'll be punishment, I think"

"Sorry I left you"

"You didn't" He grinned, looking sillier than nor I've learned here already"

"What's that?"

"When I'e, if so so comfort stand out in the cold is a crock of rancid yak butter"

"Amen," I said

Josh sla it I stood and wondered how Joshua, when he finally learned how to be the Messiah, would work the phrase "crock of rancid yak butter" into a serht, more dietary restrictions

The monks stripped me naked and poured cold water over orously with brushes made from boar's hair, then poured hot water on me, then scrubbed, then cold water, until I screamed for theenerous nicks out of my scalp as they did so, rinsed away the hair that stuck to e robe, a blanket, and a wooden rice bowl Later I was given a pair of slippers, woven frorass, and I made myself some socks from woven yak hair, but this was the measure of my wealth for six years: a robe, a blanket, a bowl, some slippers, and some socks

As Monk Nuht of my old friend Bartholomew, and how much he would have loved the idea of my newfound austerity He often told of how his Cynic patriarch Diogenes carried a boith hi from his cupped palm and declared, "I have been a fool, burdened all these years by the weight of a bohen a perfectly good vessel lay at the end of my wrist"

Yeah, well, that's all well and good for Diogenes, but when it was all I had, if anyone had tried to take my bowl they would have lost the vessel at the end of their wrist

Gaspar sat on the floor in the same small room, eyes closed, hands folded on his knees before hiht Monk bowed out of the room and Gaspar opened his eyes

"Sit"

I did

"These are the four rules for which you may be expelled from the monastery: one, a monk will have no sexual intercourse with anyone, even down to an animal"

Joshua looked atthat would anger Gaspar I said, "Right, no intercourse"

"Two: a e, shall take no thing that is not given Three: if a monk should intentionally take the life of a human or one like a human, either by his hand or by weapon, he will be expelled"

"One like a human?" I asked

"You shall see," said Gaspar "Four, a monk who claims to have reached superhuman states, or clai not done so, will be expelled Do you understand these four rules?"

"Yes," I said Joshua nodded

"Understand that there are nocircued by the other monks, you must leave the monastery"

Again I said yes and then Gaspar went into the thirteen rules for which a ht (the first of these was the heartbreaker, "no emission of semen except in a dream") and then the ninety offenses for which one would receive an unfavorable rebirth if the sins were not repented (these ranged fro an ani to a layman to have superhuman powers, even if you had them) Overall, there was an extraordinary nu disputes, but remember, ere Jews, raised under the influence of the Pharisees, who judged virtually every event of day-to-day life against the Law of Moses And with Balthasar we had studied Confucius, whose philosophy was little more than an extensive system of etiquette I had no doubt Joshua could do this, and there was a chance I could handle it too, if Gaspar didn't use that bah wet dreahteen years old and had just lived five years in a fortress full of available concubines, I had a habit, okay?)

"Monk Nuin by learning how to sit"

"I can sit," I said

"And you, Number Twenty-one, will shave the yak"

"That's just an expression, right?"

It wasn't

A yak is an extreerous-looking black horns If you've ever seen a water buffalo, iround Now sprinkle it with ot yourself a yak In a cavelike stable, thethe day to wander the raze On what, I don't know There didn't see plant life to support an aniher than h plant life in all of Judea for a herd of goats, either, and herding was one of the main occupations What did I know?

The yak provided just enough h milk and cheese from one yak for twenty-two , coarse hich needed to be harvested twice a year This venerated duty, along with corass and burrs out of the wool, fell to me There's not much to know about yaks beyond that, except for one ih practice: yaks hate to be shaved

It fell to Monks Eight and Seven to bandagethat had been so thoroughly stomped into my body I would tell you the distinction of those two soleoal of all of the o, the self, and but for a few more lines on the faces of the older men, they looked alike, dressed alike, and behaved alike I, on the other hand, was quite distinct from the others, despite es over half of my body and three out of four limbs splinted with bamboo

After the yak disaster, Joshua waited until the ht to cran the hall to my cell The soft snores of monks filled the halls, and the soft turbulence of the bats that entered their cave through theof epileptic shadows

"Does it hurt?" Joshua said

Sweat streamed from my face despite the chilly teht had wrapped my broken ribs, but every breath was a knife in the side

Joshua put his hand on my forehead

"I'll be all right, Josh, you don't have to do that"