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I already feel so very tired, and it’s only just begun

“Hey,” Calliope says, her voice a mere whisper, but it shockscommunication

My neck twists, and I give her

“I’h the lance my way so our eyes lock “I proress If you can’t talk about stuff with them, you can ask me, okay?”

The gesture is appreciated, especially since I know she doesn’t want anything to do with h Calliopeher, she’s still the kindest person I know It’s why she’s a nurse She loves helping people and easing their pain, whether it be physical or the type that’s lodged deep in the soul

I ratitude at her and turntofatherChapter 2CalliopeGrittingJi apart, and now Rafe has returned home to witness it all

Damn it all to hell, that man

What I can’t figure out is why I feel so freaking angry It’s not like I obsess about Rafe and what he did to o days—so about him at all

But it’s hard not to think about him some, despite how much I would love to just blot him out entirely My fa as how I live only three miles away, I visit quite often

Thus, I see his mom and dada lot

Whichwe had and everything he destroyed on a whim

Sure, the rage has subsided over the years I’ve gotten control of that So when I do happen to think of hiht be over at his parents’ house to say hello, and see his graduation photo on theirto myself: I wonder what Rafe’s up to And then I put hiht think: I wonder if he’s caught a raging case of syphilis—which he’d deserve, and then I’ll hope that it’s super annoying and itchy

Okay, that’s not entirely true I’ve never been a vindictive person, and I don’t wish hiht thisup inside of et away from him

To say that Rafe broke my heart would be the understatement of all time He didn’t just hurt mehe destroyed round me to dust and then just walked away

It took e that he didn’t want h to join hiue And it took so to find a measure of peace within the world around me, validation that I was a worthy woman

The e ended things was so contrary to everything we’d planned for our future Those plans had unfurled over the years as we grew up together—first pledging to always be best friends, all the way through the blossolorious love where we pro days

So many memories for hRafe to play Barbies with ree to play GI Joe with hi at the YMCA and going to movies In school, from as far back as I can remember, he was always et for bullies Then, in fifth grade, the inevitable first and experiross

We tried it again in seventh grade, and it wasn’t so gross By ninth grade, ere going steady and where one was, so was the other Fingers laced, we’d strut the halls of our high school, and the e was clear to anyone that paid attention

We were together, and alould be

I went to every single one of Rafe’s hockey ga in Brenda’s minivan to ride with her He was a hockey star, and I was popular by virtue ofintoWhen he went off to juniors, I sometimes traveled with Brenda to see him as much as I could We burned up the phone with calls, texts, and FaceTime When he returned ho up for lost time