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"She's called, e to her That's not fair to her"

Guilt overwhelue, because I'm afraid that the barest contact I have with her will cause my resolve to weaken and I'll ask about Cillian Which, of course, she'll tellI want to know

And I'htest bit of news about hiotten all aboutto have lots of babies My s she may tell me that I'm just not ready to hear

"I'll call her soon" I can't help the fact that my words sound hollow

Flynn just looks atcontest with him, to see ill blink and look away first His eyes are warhtly at the corners He has a knowing look on his face

A really, really knowing look

"Oh, God she told you about him, didn't she?"

"Yes, but only after I relentlessly haet the information She eventually caved when I told her I orried sick about you and didn't kno to help you Why didn't you tell me? Or at least Mom?"

My shoulders sag "I don't know it's too painful I guess I want to forget about him"

"Cillian?"

I nod

"Look I don't pretend to know everything and I'ave me an abbreviated version, but if you want to talk about ityou know I'll listen Hell, I'll even lend one ofand manly shoulders for you to cry on if you want"

My heart h old I've cried on his shoulder more than once

"Thanks, Flynn," I say, drawing in a shaky breath "But I really don't knohat there is to talk about I loved hiot in the way and he didn't love me back"

That's the first time I've uttered those words, either out loud or even inthes a level of truthfulness to the situation that paints a stark and barren picture for me

Oh, God Cillian didn't love me

He cared for h for hih to him

Despair wells up inin love foroffmore than open his arms and I walk in them I lay my head on his chest while he carefully wraps his arht

I let the tears fall, barely staining my cheeks before they seep into his shirt I miss Cillan at this point, like I've never missed him before But every tear that falls, I re me For every drop of wetness that Flynn absorbs, I reh For every wet sorrow that escapes me, my heart starts to accept that it's truly over

I realize, with finality, I need to get this out of my system, and move on

So I go ahead and cry, because Flynn is offering me a safe environment to do it in He whispers words of coet better with time

It takes me several minutes for the flow to stop, and when they do, I pull away

"Feel better?" he asks

"Not really," I tell hirab a paper towel and blow my nose "But I will be I knoill be"

"That's ?"

Set rid of my red and blotchy skin"

He s And wings I want to get so"

CHAPTER 26

Cillian