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“Fuck, I’m sorry,” she whispers Her eyes are wide and full of pity, which is exactly what I don’t want “And your mom? How did she …”

I sigh This is the part I’ to

“She’s still alive”

She looks confused “But you said she was dead?”

I make a face “Dead is such a permanent word …”

She glares atthis as funny as I am

“I know” I sigh “I’m an asshole”

“Why would you say she’s dead when she isn’t?” she asks, bewildered

I shrug “It’s just easier, because then I don’t have to go into all that detail”

“You tell people she’s dead because it’s easier?” Katie’s eyes flash “Easier than what?”

I rubto think I’m too far under to be saved

“Mom is alive, but she isn’t well,” I explain “She’s in a psych unit, getting treatment for her schizophrenia”

“Oh,” Katie mumbles “I’m sorry”

“Don’t be It can be et it under control, she thinks she doesn’t need the oes off it and the whole cycle continues”

“Wow That h for you,” she says

I shrug, htly around the wheel

“It’s rough, because I have twenty-six years of shit to explain whenever I talk about my mother My entire childhood revolved around her illness There are sopoints that need to be considered when talking about her that it’s just …”

“And the rest of what you said? Your dad and your brother …”

“That’s all true,” I say quietly “I’m sorry I lied to you I’m very private when it comes to my family But if I had to talk to someone about it? It would be you”

She smiles, then looks away We both sit there aardly, unsure of what to say I can tell herto figure out ords don’t sound condescending or insensitive

I don’t want to spin her some fairy-tale bullshit just to make her feel less sorry for me I want to be honest and real, because it’s what I’d want in return But if I’ the whole way and telling her everything?