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Chapter Twenty

Society does not forgive scandalous behavior

Such is the delicate lady’s maxim

—A Treatise on the Most Exquisite of Ladies

With the spectacle playing out in the Beau Monde this year, the theatre seems unnecessary

—The Scandal Sheet, November 1823

The entire family was back at Ralston House within the hour

They congregated in the library, Benedick and Rivington sitting in the high-backed chairs near the enormous fireplace, in front of which Ralston paced Juliana sat on a low chaise, flanked by Mariana and Callie

Amo, amas, amat

I love, you love, he loves

He loves

He loves me

She took a deep breath, a hitch catching in her throat

Callie stood and headed for the door “I think I shall call for tea”

“I think we need so for a decanter of whiskey on the sideboard He poured three glasses for themoment, a fourth He walked it over to Juliana “Drink this It will settle you”

“Gabriel!” Callie reprimanded

“Well, it will”

Juliana took a sip of the fiery liquid, enjoying the burn it sent down her throat At least when she was feeling that, she was not feeling the devastating ache that Simon had left with his profession of love

“Perhaps you could explain to hton came to profess his love to you in the middle of a crowded ballroom?”

The ache returned

“He was in Yorkshire,” she whispered, hating the sound of the words Hating the weakness

Ralston nodded “And tell me, did he lose his mind there?”

“Gabriel,” Callie said, warning in her tone “Have a care”

“Did he touch you?” Everyone stiffened “Don’t answer There’s no need No man behaves in such a ithout”

“Ralston” Benedick interrupted “Enough”

“He wants to marry me”

Mariana squeezed her hand “But, Juliana, that is good, is it not?”

“Well, after tonight, I aood match,” Ralston said wryly

Tears welled in Juliana’s eyes, and she took a sip of scotch to force them away

She’d been trying so hard—so hard to be so more than a scandal She’d worn a dress that was the required color, she’d danced appropriately with only the entlemanly of men, she’d convinced herself that she could be the kind of woman as known for propriety Who was known for reputation

The kind of woman he would want by his side

And still, she’d been nothingAnd when he had professed his love there, in front of the entire ton, that dark, scandalous part of her had sung with happiness And she ached for wanting hi him

And still she wanted more

He made her a perfect match

“If he seduced you, I have the right to tear him limb from limb”

“That’s enough,” Callie said, standing “Out”

“You cannot exile me from my own library, Calpurnia”

“I can and will In fact, I have Out!”

He gave a harsh laugh that did not holdanywhere” He turned to Juliana “Do you want to marry him?”

Yes

But it was not so simple

The roo for the exit “I needun momento,” she paused “Per favore”

As she reached the door, her brother called out to her, “Juliana” When she turned back, he added, “Think about what you want Whatever it is, you can have it”

She left, closing the door behind her, allowing the hallway to cloak her in darkness

She wanted Simon

She wanted his love, yes But she also wanted his respect and admiration She wanted him to consider her his equal She deserved as much, did she not? Deserved what she saw in Callie and Ralston, in Isabel and Nick, in Mariana and Rivington

She wanted that

And she did not have it

Did she?

She took a deep breath, and another, replaying the events of the evening over and over in her mind

He’d broken every rule he had—he’d ignored protocol and attended an event from which he had been uninvited, he’d allowed all of London to turn their backs on him, he’d stopped a ball

He’d stopped a ball—bringing even more scandal down upon him—even as all of London turned their backs on him

And he’d done it for her

Because he cared for her

Because he wanted to show her that she waselse

And she’d refused him

She’d refused his love

She wrapped her ar like a blow to the stomach, and the door to the library opened

Benedick stepped out into the hallway, a kind s Callie and Ralston’s argu toward her

She forced a s about me?”

He grinned “No Now they are discussing whether Callie should be riding still now that she is with child”

She gave a little huff of laughter “I iine she in”

“I would not be so certain” They were silent for aI should like to discuss with you”

“Is it about the duke? Because I would prefer not to discuss him, honestly”

“Not exactly”

“What, then?”

He hesitated, then took a deep breath “Juliana, if you would like, I would have you To wife”

As proposals went, it was not the most eloquent, but it was honest, and her eyes ide at the words She shook her head “Benedick—”

“Just hear me We enjoy each other’s coood time of it You do not have to answer me now, but should youhave need of a husband”

“No,” she said, leaning up to kiss him on the cheek “Thank you very much, Benedick, but you deserve more than a wife in need of a husband” She smiled “And I deserve more than a husband ill simply have me to wife”

He nodded once “That much, at least, is true” He paused “For what it is worth, I think Leighton loves you very much”

The words sent a sad little thrill through her “I think so, too”

“Then why not marry me?”

She snapped to attention at the words Simon stood at the top of the stairs, soaked to the skin, face etched with lines of exhaustion He had removed his hat, but his hair was plastered to his head and his coat hung wet and ragged from his shoulders He looked terrible

He looked wonderful

“How did youhow did you get in here?” she asked

“This is not the first house into which I have stor quite a career of it”