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I just coraduate school on the West Coast and , and all in all, I felt like I was ht roup of people that would be ency support system

Plus, New York has farthan California and over eight and a half million people who could be potential friends

Honestly, before turning in my final thesis, it all sounded pretty simple

Find a job—preferably as an editor at a pro house

Get an apartment

Find new friends

Find a man etc, etc

Alas, things in real life are never as easy as they are on paper, and as a result, I’ side by side without of my brother Evan’s old bachelor pad in Chelsea

As I’uy paraphernalia littering the place is an actual nightuess I can thank the stars, the sun, and thein my childhood bedroom

Still,zero, and I’ to address the reality that when it comes to the whole find-a-man task, I’m woefully behind the curve

I just kind of forgot to make it a priority

I was too busy reading Stephen King novels, studying hard to keep a perfect GPA, and chasing a level of perfection high enough to trigger unmistakable pride from my hard-to-please father

Bruce Willis—aka my dad—is a man of too many words and h sarcasm to make Amy Schumer’s new Netflix special look watered down

For as long as I can res: his family and his business—Bruce Willis & Sons Floral Established in 1980, my family’s florist shop has become one of Chelsea’s pride and joys

Ironically, my dad only has one son, my brother Evan, who lives in Austin, Texas

So, really, it’s just Bruce Willis & Wife & “Te on Working Here Forever” Daughter Floral

But that’s too long to fit on the storefront et, wondering if I’ve undergone gender reassignery

And now I, Mabel Frances Willis, ae-educated, sexually stunted woman, who’s barely held a penis in her hands

Prospects on penis-encounters aren’t looking great with that old-lady moniker, but thankfully, everyone calls me Maybe A nickname that was created because my parents realized about two years into my life that the nae where senior citizen discounts and Melba toast became a constant in my daily routine

Although, reatest nickname

The utter definition of the word revolves around indecisiveness

Do I want to meet a man? Maybe