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My home is fairly small, but quaint, with plain cream walls and a standard kitchen I love it because it has a strong roof and walls I only o and called it the beginning ofIt was actually built by Habitat for Hu Monday to repay the my home

"Hey, you’re ho room sofa with a thick textbook propped up on his chest He’s been living with me for over a year now ever since our mother disappeared No one knohere she went or what happened to her, but I wouldn’t be surprised if she was lying dead in a ditch so Jax here with er living in that shitty house withup with I honestly don’t knohat I’ on with his life, but I’ll figure it out--I always do And I’s the foray in life, I just wish I didn’t have to rely on his help so ot tired" I drop the keys on the table then plop down in the recliner "And I orried about Mason’s fever"

"You’re always tired" Jax sets the book down on the coffee table as he sits up "And I texted you like fifty ti you Mason was okay"

"Yeah, I know… I didn’t sleep very well last night Must be nerves or so a house," I lie because it’s not that--it was finals, and workingto build a house at the saain just like I was at sixteen, only it’s my own responsibilities this time instead of our mother’s

"You know, I could help with that," Jax offers with a yawn "Either help with the house building thing or get a second job or ask for more hours to help pay bills"

He’s such a sweet kid You’d never think he came out of our h that some people can tell we’re related He has a similar shade of brown hair and hazel eye color, which are traits of our mother His nose is definitely more prominent than hwith h ard for the consequences It got her a total of who kno ht me into the world, and I know for a fact she had more children before me, but only because she rah When I’d asked her where all her kids were, she’dwith their fathers When I’d asked her why my father didn’t take me with him, she’d toldto work anye" My head wobbles back against the recliner, so close to falling asleep

"What if I don’t want to go to college? What if I decided I’d rather do so There is no other option"

"Yes, mother," he jokes but then we both pause because I’m pretty much like Jax’s ave birth to him

He looks like he wants to sayagainst it I often wonder if he thinks about her and why she’s et a phone call fro they found her dead But we never really talk about it, avoiding the painful truth of why Jax is really here with o to bed," I yawn "Get some sleep before work tomorrow"

He nods "Oh, and just so you know, Mason likes peas now"

With a lot of effort, I lift e that?"

"I told hi like all those super heroes he’s obsessed with" He starts for the hall but then pauses, looking at ination You’re doing good Avery Way, way better than e had"

I crack a smile because it means a lot "Thanks, Jax"

He returns my smile "You’re welcome" Then he disappears into the hallway, and moments later, I hear his bedroom door shut

It takeso into my room I peel off my filthy clothes, slip on a pair of pajauitar I thru how to play became part of my new life--the one after ht, and like usual, the o to sleep, my eyes won’t shut It’s been that way since that day a little over two years ago when ed

The day I died

The day ot a second chance

But what that second chance is, I’ for

Finally, I can’t takeinto the bathroo pill I hate that I have to take it, but know there isn’t really a choice--I need to get some sleep As soon as I s the pill, I hit a state of panic as I wait for it to kick in

To caled on the floor, right in front of the sink Then I open the cupboard and read the note on the inside that’s written by the guy I made the exception for

Avery,

I’m not sure if you’re okay, but I hope so I know this is probably weird, so on your kitchen cupboard, but I just wanted to say that I hope you find the place where you can breathe, to where your soul can thrive again, to where you can be free, to where you can live again… I never really did see the rest of the tattoo, so I’m not sure Maybe you already have I hope so

It was nice ain

Tristan

aka the Pretty Boy

The note always s attached In another life, I would have ended up with a guy just as sweet and who re Tristan’s words always brings rasp onto theht up in drea to sleep on the kitchen floor, feeling content But that contentment floats away thealive I can’t breathe

Even though it takes a lot of energy, I e to forcethe saht before it became a memory The dreah to be a forewarning Orbutthat eventually that’s where nore the truth all I wanted, but in the end, all that rage was only going to end in flames

But somehow I survived A survivor of a lot I even tattooed it onwith a cross

Survivor

But why did I survive?

Life?

Conner?

Myself?