Page 58 (1/2)

Lou just sat in the kitchen and cried Not proper sobbing, just silent tears that ran down her face and which she wiped aith the palm of her hand I couldn’t think what to say to her

Which was fine I had plenty to say to everyone else

All but one of the reporters cleared off by half past seven I didn’t know if they had given up, or if Thoo out of the letter box every ti I told Louisa to bath Thoet out of the kitchen, but also because that way I could go through all the es on our answerphone and delete the newspaper ones while she couldn’t hearso nice, so understanding Some of them even offered herh I admit I was a teeny bit te All the while, I heard Lou talking to Tho his six inches of soapsuds with the Bat you don’t know about children unless you have theers don’t allow you to dwell on tragedy for too long And then I hit the last e

‘Louisa? It’s Camilla Traynor Will you call me? As soon as possible?’

I stared at the answerphone I rewound and replayed it Then I ran upstairs and whipped Thomas out of the bath so fastthere, the torapped tightly around hi and confused, was already halfway down the stairs,her by the shoulder

‘What if she hates me?’

‘She didn’t sound like she hated you’

‘But what if the press are surrounding them there? What if they think it’s all my fault?’ Her eyes ide and terrified ‘What if she’s ringing to tell me he’s done it?’

‘Oh, for Christ’s sake, Lou For once in your life, just get a grip You won’t know anything unless you call Call her Just call You don’t have a bloody choice’

I ran back into the bathroom, to set Thomas free I shoved him into his pyjamas, told him that Granny had a biscuit for him if he ran to the kitchen super fast And then I peered out of the bathroom door, to peek at my sister on the phone down in the hallway

She was turned away fro the hair at the back of her head She reached out a hand to steady herself

‘Yes,’ she was saying ‘I see’ And then, ‘Okay’

And after a pause, ‘Yes’

She looked down at her feet for a good minute after she’d put the phone down

‘Well?’ I said

She looked up as if she’d only just seenabout the newspapers,’ she said, her voice still nued me – to coht out this evening’

26

In other circue that I, Lou Clark, a girl who had rarely been more than a bus ride fro to her third country in less than a week But I packed an overnight case with the swift efficiency of an air stewardess, rejecting all but the barest necessities Treena ran around silently fetching any other things she thought I ht need, and then we headed downstairs We stopped halfway down Mu side by side in the ominous way they used to do e sneaked back late fro atto Switzerland,’ she said ‘And she needs to leave now There’s only one flight left today’

We were about to move when Mum stepped forward

‘No’ Her mouth was set into an unfamiliar line, her arms folded aardly in front of her ‘Really I don’t want you involved If this is what I think it is, then no’

‘But –’ Treena began, glancing behind at me

‘No,’ said Mum, and her voice held an unusually steely quality ‘No buts I’ve been thinking about this, about everything you told us It’s wrong Morally wrong And if you get e a man kill himself, then you could end up in all sorts of trouble’

‘Your ht,’ Dad said

‘We’ve seen it in the news This could affect your whole life, Lou This college interview, everything If you get a criood job or anything –’

‘He’s asked for her to conore hiiven six ood it’s brought her, judging by the state of things A fat lot of good it’s brought this fahbours thinking we’ve been done for benefit fraud or so of herself, and now they want her to go to that dreadful place in Switzerland and get involved in God knohat Well, I say no No, Louisa’

‘But she has to go,’ Treena said

‘No, she doesn’t She’s done enough She said herself last night, she’s done everything she could’ Mu to oing to do to their own son, I don’t want Louisa involved I don’t want her ruining her whole life’

‘I think I can make my own mind up,’ I said

‘I’m not sure you can This is your friend, Louisa This is a young man with his whole life ahead of him You cannot be part of this I’m … I’m shocked that you could even consider it’ Mu you up to help someone end his life! Would you end Granddad’s life? Do you think we should shove hinitas too?’