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"He’ll take the job," Gavin answers for ain

Chapter 3 – Suck on Those Giblets

"YOU DID WHAT?!"

I realize h when my mother winces and covers her ears But seriously, she

"Please tell me you did NOT hire Tyler to work at Seduction and Snacks Are you insane?" I ask, abandoning the e a seventy-percent off sale on Coach purses that I should be writing a blog post about right now Only so this insane could tear my eyes away from the new coral colored Peyton leather satchel

It’s so pretty I want to pet it

"According to the doctors, no, I am not insane Borderline, with homicidal tendencies towards my children, but that’s understandable," she replies with a s a hissy fit, I should probably warn you that my mom, Liz, is not like other moms She says whatever she thinks and has no filter We have an unconventional relationship in that she doesn’t hesitate to call my sisters or me assles andlike assles just to get her riled up Sometimes it’s fun to watch my mom lose her shit She’s obviously determined to turn the tables today

It’s no secret that my mother doesn’t really like Tyler, whichthat she actually hired him to work for her coure out why in the hell I ever slept with hihteen times

"You have to fire hi," I beg

There is no way I can go to work at that place every day knowing he’s going to be there It’s bad enough he shows up unannounced all the ti out with Gavin; this would be much worse and make me hate that job more than I already do

My mom rolls her eyes and takes a seat at the kitchen table "If you’re going to continue sleeping with hi sweaters at theI’ht this second

"Oh, please I heard barnyard aniht and so ‘Pull my reins, bitch!’ I realize you’re twenty-one-years old and theoretically an adult, but if I have to hear that shit oneto sleep, I will beat you like a red-headed step child," she warns