Page 18 (1/1)

He’s right I need sleep so bad But when he pulls away I grab his ar in and out, and with each cycle, James slips down the sand a little

"Please don’t leave me," I whisper, too late He disappears into the dark water and I’ain

I ith the worst headache AndI roll out of bed and stumble over to the kitchen sink, my eyes still half-closed I open the tap and stickuntil erator open Empty, save for a few condiers I need to eat

I slao turn on the shower, strip, wash quickly, and then realize I have no clean towels I drip dry as I search for clothes I drag the underwear up s and say fk the bra A couple of stacked tank tops--both white so I don’t stick out--and another pair of cut-off jeans finishes the job I cohthe door closed behind me

My phone tells me it’s seven PM on Monday I’ve lost six days of life since II’ve been doing is not very sed up on the Ativan, unable to react I was barely functioning

I walk past the Mexican place I ate there last tiain for a while I don’t want to become friendly with the food people I don’t want to be a ‘local’ and have them wave at me as I pass by So I walk east, the opposite direction of the beach, cross over Fifth and head up Main to find some restaurant I’ve never eaten in before It takes me a while because I’ve lived here for eleven months, so most of them I’ve entered at least once But I’m jumpy now The idea that James could’ve reported e

It’s dumb to be careless Especially when I’ve co very valuable froanization and eleven months later, I’m still alive

Is it by design? If it was so easy for James to pick me out, how hard would it be for the Company men to find me? Have they left me alone for a reason? Did they send James to assess my state of mind?

I pick a random eatery and scan the s I can think of Shrie Coke I need the calories because the walk over has alaze out onto Sixth Street Chewingabout life James His attention and the way it madesex

I have to admit, it makes sense It put that filthy act in perspective and the longer I think about his beco it in the can as I leave and head back towards the beach I’ve got a little while before the sun sets, so I takein the set to Pier Plaza I walk right to the terraced steps and hop onto the first pillar, standing up to ht I shieldfor him He said, Come find me But how? He’s the one who foundmy hand from my face as the sun beats onfor s like look at a phone or -shop But there is no one who looks likeand then ainst a short pillar in front of the grass A few yards off there’s a group of skaters doing tricks off the loall that separates the bike path fro on e All blond, tanned, and shirtless Handsome even I don’t nor invisible to take notice or worry about stupid teenager things

But I’ve seen one of them before In fact, now that I think about it, I’ve seen hiht Like this beach is his whole life His sh

I sigh as I watch his that appear to defy gravity He falls, laughs, gets up, does it again His friends are all the saetic, beautiful

He looks my way and I’

He waves I don’t even blink

He turns and starts talking with his friends and then they burabs it by the front wheels, and walks towards"Hey," he says, dropping his board and sitting down next to ht?"

"I’ for intentions God, are all boys beautiful? Or is it this beach? I’ve never paid ood luck

He puts out his hand "Scott"

My hand finds his automatically "Nice to meet you, Scott"

He sonna tell me your na to make myself small