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"Yes, I mean no," I stammer

"But she told you it was?"

"Yes"

"And you believe her?"

"I have no reason to think she’d lie about that What would be the purpose now?"

She nods, agreeing "What else did she say?"

"She said she didn’t want to tell me She wanted to leave the past in the past"

"Why didn’t she tell you before?"

"She said she tried to contact me, but I didn’t call her back"

"Did she?"

"Serena, come on Yeah, she called me, but" I stop, not really sure what the but is That she didn’t try hard enough, try often enough?

"Where did you leave it?"

I drop her hand and cradlepissed I had a right to know" I glance over at her "I had a right to know"

"Yes, you did, but put yourself in her place You ith so and I’m sure she was scared It must have been hard for her Shit, it was hard for nant I enty and scared shitless--scared to tell Jason, scared to tell Mom, and so scared to have a baby"

"Yeah, but you had him And you kept him" My voice trails off

"Yes, but my circumstances were different I ith Jason He was there to help h ives me a stern look "No I’m not I just think maybe you should think a little more about her and a little less about yourself"

CHAPTER 22

Burn

Bell

Guilt chased ed to so a friend to drive uilt for giving up my baby It was a domino effect--I chased sonant When I found out, I couldn’t wait to tell hiht change things between us But in et houilt was more than I could stand How could I raise a child? I was irresponsible and incapable--I was sure of that And with that realization caive my baby the life I knew I couldn’t

I never blamed anyone for my actions but myself--not my dead father, not my mother, not my brothers, and not any for around the fringes of my very existence For years, it teased gedthatwas a friendship with a very special person--Dahlia London Her kindness and understanding helped h my pain and made me understand it was okay to move on With her support and that of my fa and decided it was tiuilt is still there Time can never fully heal those wounds But I had come to accept my decision and because of that, I was able to start anew It hadn’t been easy My wounds ran deep Yet somehoas confident that I could continue to heal My choices had led me to where I ended up I had accepted that When I started down this path, I was a young, iirl who looked for love in all the wrong places

Now I’ve turned reat but really well Sure,for Tate Wyatt started as a dream job, but the novelty wore off the more his attention toward h And I don’t really love living here However, I’m not home that often and my fa about telling Ben is that I’ All the et them out I spent all day in bed and called in sick on Monday, but Tuesday comes way too fast I wake up from a dream The sa I yell, "Daton, you came back into my life with all your charm and turned my world around one minute, then upside down the next just like you did toover and over, You should have known better You did know better You kept yourself at a distance You tried so hard to stay aloof But the more time you spent with him, the more ti to myself, "Yeah, it’s all true but it doesn’tonto the floor and I pushmyself out of it, force myself to dry my hair, dab on a minimal amount of makeup, and dress as casually and coet aith it

With coffees in hand I enter the showroo at Josie’s desk with his ar to her His head snaps up

I cross the rooe a smile

Tate takes his and with a huff he stor to Josie, it reopens "Bell, I need you in ain

"What’s going on with you?" Josie asks, clearly concerned

"Nothing" I take the lid off my coffee

"You look like shit"

"Jeezthank you"

She laughs "Seriously, where have you been and what’s the est assle that ever walked on the planet Did so happen?"

I don’t want to break down at work "Oh, Josie, so much has happened, but Tate is the least of my worries He showed up at my event on Friday with Ro a threesome"

"With you?" she asks, shocked

"No!"