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Sitting in the dark with her bare feet on the coffee table, she continued to beht over her door shone dimly, but it didn't really illuminate the room, despite the uncurtained s If she had any sense, she'd get up and turn on the lamp, but in her present frame of mind she preferred to sit in the dark

Soh hershe could see the shadowy shape of a ht in her throat as she ran to answer it There, on the other side, stood Nate with his hands shoved in his back pockets

At first all they did was stare at each other Then, as if netically drawn to him, she stepped closer

"I don't knohat's happening to us," he whispered, "but I couldn't just leave you like this"

Rachel felt the same way

"For the first tio to sea"

Rachel didn't want him to leave, either

"Come with me"

"Where?"

"I don't know Let's sit on the beach and watch the stars"

She wanted to shriek and sob with joy "Are you going to kissto letabout it"

He threw back his head and laughed "Don't think too long"

Forty-Eight

The alarroan, Ian rolled over and cuddled Cecilia close Slipping his hand over her waist, he lightly pressed his pale

"Hmm," Cecilia purred softly as the radio played a Carly Siet up"

He kissed the top of her head "Afraid so"

She laid her hand over his "Baby says good , baby," Ian whispered The words nearly stalled in his throat This was the lasthe'd be with Cecilia until after the baby was born The George Washington was being deployed to the South Pacific for the next number of er

Cecilia rolled onto her back and looked up at hi to be okay Stop worrying"

Ian wasn't sure whether she was trying to convince him or herself

"I'll be fine I have friends this tiainst his bare shoulder

"Does that mean you won't miss me?" Ian attempted to make a joke out of it, but failed

"Oh, honey, you knoill"

"Sohts about now Makes it easier to leave"

Kissing his jaw, she whispered, "I'd rather ue"

"Me, too" He never waswith her, anyway He loved Cecilia beyond reason And, in spite of his fears, he'd co another child until he felt "ready," it would never happen

"How much time do we have?" Cecilia whispered as she stroked his upper arh"

Her s between his Their loveent Afterward they held each other for a long ti to release the other It meant they had to rush so he could make his quarters, but Ian didn't care

Cecilia hurriedly dressed to drive hiathered up the re area to start the car Although she'd tried to hide it, Ian had seen the tears in her eyes She wasn't the only one who felt emotionally shaky; in all the years he'd been with the navy, he'd never dreaded going to sea the way he did now His attitude must have shown because the minute he slipped into the car, Cecilia offered hi to be fine," she assured hih her bravado

Ian desperately wanted to believe her But he couldn't quite overcome his doubts Dread al area

"It really is all right, Ian" She gently touched his knee

"You know this, do you?" He didn't mean to sound so sharp, but every fear caused by the death of their first child was staring him in the face with this second one The knot in his stoo away and wouldn't until he knew for a fact that she'd delivered a healthy baby girl

"I'll send you updates every tio to the doctor"

"Promise?" Mixed in with his fears was the suspicion that Cecilia would try to protect him fronancy Needed to know

"I promise," she vowed

They rode in silence for a short while All the ti, Ian worried that when the ut told hi itself They'd known Cecilia was pregnant with a girl when he'd left three years ago She was pregnant again with a girl

He'd been at sea when Allison was born

He'd be at sea when their second child was born, too

Cecilia's ultrasound had looked perfectly normal the first ti abnorht on his chest was almost more than he could bear

Forty-Nine

Maryellen sat on the balcony outside the et Sound She could see Mount Rainier clearly in the distance It seeh to touch

Katie slept peacefully, curled up on Maryellen's lap The little girl's hand clutched her favorite blanket, her other thu her eyes, she breathed in the briny scent of the sea and listened to the muted sounds of late afternoon It'd been nine days since she'd ht, and nine days since her heart was torn to shreds

Jon had been attentive and thoughtful, anticipating her every need Yet they lived as polite strangers He orried about her, and Maryellen suspected he'd talked to her mother because Grace had been by to visit nearly every day

At the sound of her husband's footsteps behind her, Maryellen glanced over her shoulder

"Did I wake you?" he asked

She shook her head