Page 9 (1/2)

Chapter Nine

Here I a, China

The other people that play on the ping-pong team are real nice fellers what come from ever walk of life, an they is specially nice to me The Chinaooks from what I seen in Vietnam First off, they is neat an clean an very polite Second, they is not tryin to murder me

The American State Department have sent a feller with us who is there to tell us how to behave aroun the Chinamen, an of all I have met, he is the only one not so nice In fact, he is a turd Mister Wilkins is his name, an he have a little thin moustache and always carry a briefcase an worry about whether or not his shoes is shined an his pants is pressed or his shirt is clean I bet in the et up an spit-shines his asshole

Mister Wilkins is always on otta bow back Guotta quit adjustin yoursef in public Guot the table ht Them Chinamen eat with two little sticks an it is almost impossible to shovel any food in your mouth with em, an so a lot of it wind up on my clothes No wonder you do not see a lot of fat Chinamen aroun You would think they would of learnt to use a fork by now

Anye is playin a whole lot of ood players But we is holdin our own At night they has alo out for supper soht, we is all sposed to go out to a restaurant called the Peking Duck, an when I get down to the lobby of the hotel, Mister Wilkins say, "Gue that shirt It look like you has been in a food fight or soet a China in Chinese that I aive it to the cab driver

"We are going ahead," Mister Wilkins say "You give the driver the note an he will take you there" So I gone on back to my room an put on a new shirt

Anyhow, I find a cab in front of the hotel an get in, an he drive away I be searchin for the note to give hier out I one in the middle of town The driver keep jabberin back at o, an I keep sayin, "Peking Duck, Peking Duck," but he be thowin up his hans an givin o on for bout a hour, an let hts Finally I tap hi Duck," an start to flap s All of a sudden, the driver get a big ole smile, an he start noddin an drive off Ever once in a wile he look back at ain Bout a hour later, he stop an I look out the winder an damn if he ain’t took ettin late, an I ain’t had no dinner or nothin, an I’ettin bout starved, so we pass this restaurant an I tole the driver to let ive us, an he han o

I went in the restaurant an set down an I ht as well of been on the moon This lady come over an look at me real funny, an han me a menu, but it is in Chinese, so after a wile, I jus point to four or five different things an figger one of theood When I am thru, I paid up an went on out on the street an try to fine uess, when they pickI knowed, I has been thown in jail They is a big ole Chinalish, an he is axin arettes, jus like they did in theot me out; Mister Wilkins come down to the jail an he is talkin for bout a hour, an they let o

Mister Wilkins is hoppin mad "Do you realize, Gump, that they think you are a spy?" he say "Do you knohat this can do to this whole effort? Are you crazy?"

I started to tell hio Anyhow, after that, Mister Wilkins buy a big balloon from a street vender an tied it on my shirt button, so he can tell where I is "at all times" Also, from then on, he pinned a note on my lapel, sayin who I was an where I am stayin It made me feel like a fool

One day they load us up in a bus an take us way out of town to a big river an they is a lot of Chinamen standin aroun lookin official an all, an the reason, we find out soon enough, is that the head Chinaman of them all, Chair ole fat Budda-lookin guy, an he has taken off his pajay trunks an they says Chaironna swim this river by hissef an they want us to watch him do it

Well, the Chair an folks is takin pichers an all them other Chinamen be chatterin away an lookin pleased He is bout halfway cross the river, when he stop an raise his han an wave at us Everbody wave back