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3 The Samurai of Jackson Street

TOMMY

When he first arrived in San Francisco, Tommy Flood had shared a closet-size roo, all of whom had wanted topacked into a take-out box of Kung Pao chicken," Toh it wasn’t like that at all, and Toe which he felt was his duty as a writer, it was very crowded and suys

"I think they want to pack e," Too for that kind of stuff"

As it turned out, the Chinese guys didn’t go for that kind of stuff either, but were, in fact, very reen cards

Fortunately, only a week later, in the parking lot of the Marina Safehere he worked nights, Toeous redhead named Jody Stroud, who rescued hi him her love, a nice loft apartment, and immortality Unfortunately, little more than a month after that, their minion, Abby, had theht to find that despite his great vath, he couldn’t move a muscle

"I’d rather be trapped in a take-out box of Kung Pao chicken," To, which he couldn’t

Meanwhile, right next to hi the same bronze shell, his beloved Jody drifted in a drea able to turn herself to mist, a trick she had learned from Elijah Ben Sapir, her vaht, and the floating in a dream-world, she could endure decades inside the statue Tommy, however, had never learned how to turn to mist There had never been time to teach him So come sundown, his vampire senses came on like neon, and he experienced every second of his confine in his shell-an alpha predator pacing the cage of hishis reason Of course, he did the only thing he could do: he went barking at the moon mad

CHET

He’d have to lick about a et the taste of meter maid out of hiskicks through the dust that was the meter maid’s remains, and headed across the street and into the alley, where he curled up in the dark and set about blunting the human taste

It was only a little over a month since the old va all sense of his former self Ti next to Willia with a paper cup and a sign that said, I AM HOMELESS AND MY CAT IS HUGE Chet was indeed very large, and while ht of thirty-five pounds on a diet of seers and French fries donated by passersby outside of McDonald’s

Now Chet hunted the night, taking down nearly any warm-blooded creature he encountered: rats, birds, squirrels, cats, dogs, and even the occasional human At first it had only been drunks and other homeless, and the first time he had drained one, his old friend William, who turned to dust in front of him, Chet yowled, ran, and hid under a Duht and all of the next day There was no regret, sier and elation of the blood rush It was beyond the satisfaction of the kill, it was positively sexual, so Chet had never known as a normal cat, as he’d been neutered by the anith, and senses far more sensitive than even a human-based vampire, Chet, like his human counterparts, found that he was physically restored to perfection In other words, his junk orking

He found that soon after the kill he desperately needed to hu, the better Above the s food, and urine-bathed curbs that pervaded the City, he caught the scent of a feiven his newly heightened senses, he’d find her

A wave of excitement undulated under the fur of his spine, fur that had rown back since the humans had shaved him, mated in front of him, and drank his blood, which served to traumatize his little kitty consciousness before he was turned varown into as a vaeance For since his metamorphosis, it wasn’t just his senses that had expanded His brain, which before had run a loop of "eat-nap-crap, repeat," was noing into a whole neareness, getting bigger, even as Chet grew He was a good sixty pounds now, and roughly as shter than a brick Dog The hated There was dog on the air Co closer He could smell it-them-two of them And now he could hear them He arose from his butt bath and screeched like an electrified lynx In response, the neighborhood echoed with a chorus of yowls from a dozen other vampire cats

THE EMPEROR

"Steady, fellows," said the Eolden retriever and scratched under the chin of the Boston terrier, who squir like a frantic, black-and-white, bug-eyed kangaroo mutant

"Cat! Cat! Cat! Cat! Cat!" barked Buie slobber across the Emperor’s palm "Cat! Murder, pain, fire, evil, cat! Can’t you smell them? Everywhere! Must chase, chase, chase, bite, bite, bite, letto save you, for the love of God, CAT! CAT! CAT!"

Unfortunately, Bu, and while the Emperor could tell that the Boston terrier was upset, he had no idea why (Anyone who translates dog knows that only about a third of what Bu The rest was just noise he needed to olden retriever, having battled va steady by nature, was , but despite Bummer’s tendency to overreact, he had to admit, the s, it wasn’t just cat, it was dead cat Dead cat walking Wait, as that? Not cat-cats Oh, this was not good

"He’s right about the cat," Lazarus ruffed, nudging the Ehborhood, o over to North Beach and see if anyone dropped a beef jerky or so I could sure use a beef jerky Or we can stay and die Whatever I’ood with it"

"Easy,was aes, and as he looked around, kneaded the spot between Buy-brain biscuits He was a great, woolly, thunderstorray bearded, fine witted and fiercely loyal to the people of his city He had lived on the streets of San Francisco as long as anyone could reedy, ho landmark, a spirit, and a conscience, and for the ht pay royalty, despite the fact that he was a raving loon

The street was deserted, but a half a block away the E enforceally parked Audi The cart’s rotating yellow caution lights chased thes like drunken, jaundiced Tinkerbells, but there was no officer in sight

"Strange It’s long past ti Perhaps we should investigate, gents"

But before he could stand, Bummer leapt out of the Emperor’s pocket and e with a staccato barking fit Lazarus took off after the black-and-white fur-rocket, and the old s would carry him

They found Bu inside an eray powder The Emperor’s eyes ide He backed across the sidewalk and stood against the fire door of one of the industrial lofts that lined the street He had seen this before He knew the signs But when he had seen the old vampire and his coo, he thought his city rid of the bloodsucking fiends What now?

There was a crackling static noise from the police cart: a radio Call it in Alert his people to the danger He rolled to the cart, fumbled with the door catch, and reached for the microphone

"Hello," he said into the microphone "This is the Emperor of San Francisco, Emperor of San Francisco, protector of Alcatraz, Sausalito, and Treasure Island, and I’d like to report a vahosted through the ether, uninterrupted

Lazarus padded to the old man’s side and barked furiously, "You have to push the button You have to push the button" Unfortunately, while the noble retriever understood English, he only spoke dog, and the Eet the instruction

"Button! Button! Button! Button!" Bu up and down in front of the police cart He scurried around to the door and jumped in on the Emperor’s lap to show hirowled Lazarus sarcastically Golden retrievers are not a very sarcastic breed, and he felt a little asha that tone of voice "Okay Button! Button! Button! Uh-oh"

"Button! Button! Button! Uh-oh, what?" barked Bummer

A short ruff from the retriever: "Cat"

Lazarus boiled out a lol and laid his ears back against his head

The E down the sidewalk toward theht fro back from the cats’ eyes like red coals

A screech, there were twoacross the street Lazarus turned to face the now A chorus of hisses from behind The Emperor looked in the rearviewfrom behind

"Quick, Lazarus, in the cart Up, boy, in the cart"

Lazarus was spinning now, trying to watch all of the cats at once, warning them off with bared teeth and bristled hair But the cats ca their own teeth

"Come now," said the E landed hard on the roof of the cart and Bummer yelped Another thue cat in the bed of the cart, co to claw around the backThe old man pulled the door shut "Run, Lazarus, run!"

Lazarus caught the first cat in his jaws and was shaking it furiously when the rest fell upon him

STEVE

"There’s nefarious shit afoot, Foo," said Abby "Bring portable sun and fry these nosferatu kitties before they no" Wong had no idea what his girlfriend, Abby, was talking about, and it wasn’t the first time In fact,about, but he had learned if he was patient, and listened, and reed with her, she would mercilessly sex hiot the rand-up part), who spoke an obscure, country dialect of Cantonese, that sounded to the uninitiated like so a chicken to death with a banjo Just wait, and all would becoically roent, and the patience ga to work Her voice in his Bluetooth headset was like having a malevolent fairy bite his ear

"I’, Abby I’ll be home as soon as I finish up here"

"Now, Foo There’s a herd, or flock, or a-what do you call a bunch of kitties?"

"A box?" Foo offered

"Fucktard!"

"A fucktard of kitties? Okay, sure, that could be it A pride of lions, a murder of crows"