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Then he just started to cry in this really violent way

Hison She said, "What happened?"

I stood there with ht by her and into his room

I’d never been so confused

I couldn’t even explain what had happened to my parents, because I had no idea

You’d think they would have called Mrs Beal and asked a bunch of questions, but I don’t think they did, and I rerowing up," to Linda, as ly my black eye appeared than the reason for Asher’s freak-out

Asher didn’t come to school for a few days, and then he just showed up at my house late one afternoon, and said, "Can we talk?"

"Sure," I said

My dad and Linda weren’t hoed animal I had never seen him pace like that before

"I’m sorry I fucked up our project," he said

"It’s okay" I didn’t really care about failing or anything like that, but what he had done to me definitely wasn’t okay, and I knew it

Why did I say it was okay?

I should have said, "Why the hell did you punchwith you?" But I didn’t

I wish I had

Maybe if I had gotten angry…

"So trip," he said

He looked at me in this crazy way

He looked so desperate

But then he broke eye contact, said, "Never o," and walked out of my roo a word I kno that I should have chased hi, promised to help him, or--at the very least--I should have told so weird, but I was afraid of that desperate look I didn’t want Asher to punch ain--and I was just a kid

Hoas I supposed to knohat to do?

The next day, Asher returned to school and really appeared to be okay For a while everything seeo back to normal Our teacher even let us redo our Machu Picchu model for three-quarters credit, which we accoinal

But then Asher started picking fights with kids at school ere s lunch periods--saying crazy weird stuff like he caught rab his dick in the locker roo to tripme into lockers

I didn’t like it at all, but I didn’t say anything

Why?

I should have said so--not just to stick up for myself, but because I think Asher wanted me to save him

Like maybe he wanted me to make it stop the whole tiet so fucking angry that I would finally tell the adults in our lives that he needed help I wonder now if all of what happened afterward--the bullying and then the really bad shit--was his way of punishingto protect him

When I finally stood up for myself--when he stopped with me--I knew there would be others

What if I had the power to save both of us--all of us--all along?

I need to take care of what I should have taken care of a long tio

I need to et suddenly makes an appearance in Mrs Beal Makes Her Perverted Son His Last Meal--there he is on the kitchen’s bay- drive-in et known as "Asher’s et a kiss on the cheek

Priet looks like the all-American next-door boy in the hter to the prom The dutiful-son lie plastered all over that drive-in un blood drops that race through er the trigger62

Every inch of h it’s probably less than forty degrees out A e to take off my shirt--that’s how hot I feel It’s like I sed the sun

Priht comes on a second later, which is supposed to be my cue to move and put the plan into action, but et flicks on his colows like an alien

Kill the alien, I think

Reht

He’s not huet

Releaned from the Internet

I leave my body and my essence floats updown on the flesh and bones and blood--the matter--I used to inhabit

I can’t see ht aret

My legs don’t walk, but I start to glide across the backyard, through the darkness, light as a ghost

I look like a rigid lowercase r being pulled across ice

What’s pullingdohich is when I realizemy flesh like a helium birthday balloon tied to a little kid’s wrist63

I’ what he did to me in that very bedroom so many times

How confused I felt