Page 18 (1/2)

"You said you thought she was compelled"

I nodded

"By what?"

I put the photo back where it belonged I watched Hanniford try not to e it He looked into theist, a psychiatrist, any of those things I'm just a uesses I'd guess she could never stop looking for Daddy She wanted to be so to fuck her And that was all right with her because that hat Daddy was, he was a nant and then went away to Korea and was never heard froain He was soht, because the men she was attracted to were alwaysfor Daddy because if you weren't careful he ht take a lot of pills and it would be tio away That's why it was safer all around if Daddy gave you money Then it was all on a cash-and-carry basis and Daddy wouldn't flip out over you and Mommy wouldn't take pills and you could stay where you were, you wouldn't have to leave I'm not a psychiatrist and I don't know if this is the way it works in textbooks or not I never read the textbooks and I never et inside of her life until her life was over I kept trying to get into her life and I kept getting into her death instead Do you have anything to drink?"

"Pardonto drink? Like bourbon"

"Oh I think there's a bottle of so or other"

How could you not knohether or not you had any liquor around?

"Get it"

His face went through so who the hell I thought I was to order him around, and then he realized that it was iot up and went over to a cabinet and opened a door

"It's Canadian Club," he announced

"Fine"

"I don't believe I have anything to lass" And if you don't have a glass, that's all right, sir

He brought the bottle and a water tumbler and watched with clinical interest as I poured whiskey until the glass o-thirds full I drank off about half of it and put the glass down on top of his desk Then I picked it up quickly because itotherwise, and I made hesitant motions and he decoded them and handed me a couple of memo slips that could serve as a coaster

"Scudder?"

"What?"

"Do you suppose a psychiatrist could have helped her?"

"I don't know Maybe she went to one I couldn't find anything in her apartest that she did, but it's possible I think she was helping herself"

"By living the way she did?"

"Uh-huh Her life was a fairly stable one It may not look like it from the outside, but I think it was That's why she carried the Maisel girl as a roommate It's also why she hooked up with Vanderpoel Her apartment had a very settled feel to it Well-chosen furniture A place to live in I think theher way through, and I would guess that she consciously saw it that way The men represented physical and e, and I think she anticipated reaching a point where she wouldn't need them anymore"

I drank some more whiskey It was a little sweet for h

I said, "In some ways I learned more about Richie Vanderpoel than I did about Wendy One of the people I talked to said all ministers' sons are crazy I don't know that that's true, but I think most of theht type Stern, cold I doubt that he ever showed the boy much in the way of warmth Richie's mother killed herself when he was six years old No brothers or sisters, just the kid and his father and a dried-up housekeeper in a rectory that could double as a s about both of his parents His feelings in that area coood for each other"

"Good for each other!"

"Yes"

"For God's sake, he killed her!"

"They were good for each other She was a woman he wasn't afraid of, and he was a man she couldn't mistake for her father They were able to have a doave them both a measure of security they hadn't had before And there was no sexual relationship to coether?"

I shook my head "Richie was ho as a hohter He didn't like it ave hiet away fro to prove his manhood because she didn't want hi the rounds of the gay bars And I think she stopped seeing s I couldn't prove it, but earlier she had been getting taken out for dinner several nights a week The kitchen in her apartment was fully stocked when I saw it I think Richie cooked dinner for the two of theo that I thought Wendy orking things out I think both of theether Maybe they would have started sleeping together eventually Maybe Wendy would have stopped seeing uessing, that's all any of this is, but I'd take the guess a little further I think they would have gotten ht even have made it work"

"That's very hypothetical"

"I know"

"You h they were in love"

"I don't know that they were in love I don't think there's any doubt that they loved each other"

He picked up his glasses, put thelass and took a s at his hands Every now and then he looked up at the two photographs on top of his desk

Finally he said, "Then why did he kill her?"

"No way to answer that He didn't have any ot mixed up with memories of his mother's death Anyway, that's not your question"