Page 14 (1/2)

Frances Hodgson Burnett

Thursday, January 1, Midnight, Royal Genovian bedchamber

MY NEW YEAR’S RESOLUTIONS BY PRINCESS AMELIA MIGNONETTE GRIMALDI THERMOPOLIS RENALDO, AGE 14 YEARS AND 8 MONTHS

I will stop bitingthe fake ones

I will stop lying Grand anyway, thanks to my traitorous nostrils, which flare every time I tell a fib, so it’s not like there is even a point in trying to be less than truthful

I will never veer fro televised address to the Genovian public

I will stop accidentally saying

I will stop asking François, uard, to teach me French sords

I will apologize to the Genovian Olive Growers Association for that thing with the pits

I will apologize to the Royal Chef for slipping Grandh I have told the palace kitchen repeatedly that I do not eat liver)

I will stop lecturing the Royal Genovian Press Corps on the evils of s cancer, that is their prerogative

I will achieve self-actualization

I will stop thinking so much about Michael Moscovitz

Oh, wait It’s okay for me to think about Michael Moscovitz, BECAUSE HE IS MY BOYFRIEND NOW!!!!!!!!

MT + MM = TRUE LOVE 4-EVER

Friday, January 2, 2 pm, Royal Genovian Parliament

You know, I am supposed to be on vacation Seriously Ifun, oing to be easy, as I will be ebra II, not to mention Health and Safety class Everybody at school was all, Oh, you are so lucky, you get to spend Christ waited on hand and foot

Well, first of all, there is nothing so great about living in a castle Because guess what? Castles are totally old And yeah, it’s not like this one was built in 4 A D, or whenever it was unde first became ruler of Genovia But it was still built in, like, the 1600s, and let me tell you what they didn’t have in the 1600s:

Cable

DSL

Toilets