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To inti woht in the heart Also, we know this doesn’t ht now, but it hen you’re done reading

To billionaires: Thank you for being so fun to write

PS Hi winks We have husbands, but they won’t mind if you pay us to come spend time on your yacht and eat fancy cheese

We’re not hookers, even though this makes us sound like it We swear We’re just writers who like yachts and cheese

To Colleen Hoover: Thanks for doing such a good job being us Oryou?

We’re confused

My naht know ht not

So, I’ll just take this time to tell you about myself

I—and pretty much everyone else—would describe myself as an insanely handso, and irresistible man of many talents

I’m confident, ets lost in the logistics of people’s opinions

I take life by the balls I live without regrets or hesitancy I do what I want, whenever I want, without fear of judgment or societal constraints

Basically, if Lenny Kravitz were an insanely successful billionaire banker and had an extra two inches of length behind his zipper, he’d be od, for that matter—but what I lack in iving pleasure

I’ue

And so daht as well call me Santa Thatch

Sis

But before you start licking your lips and getting amped up to know : this story isn’t mine to tell It’s not even about me, really

I know I know What a fucking disappointht?

But I’ve had my time, and now, I’m told, it’s best if I pass the torch

And I guess, if I have to give up the liuy in this story to turn it over to

See, while I’uys I know is

And, while I knoould be considered “mannerly” to tell you his name, I’ve never really been one to play by the rules Plus, I’ honest

But don’t worry, I never tease without the certainty of satisfaction and pleasure in the end With e climax way