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When he saw me, he exclaimed, “Hi, Casey! JoJo told me it’s your birthday, so like, happy birthday and stuff!”

“Thanks Technically it was yesterday, since it’s after ht” I put the plate on the counter and opened the refrigerator I was starving since I hadn’t eaten anything duringseemed like way too much effort

“That doesn’t one to bed yet, so it’s still your birthday” Lark’s big, brown eyes shifted to the slice of cake, and he asked, “Are you going to eat that?”

“Nope, it’s all yours”

“Wow, thanks!” Lark peeled back the plastic wrap and tucked in with the serving spoon He was a suy with a slibird It was the only way he could eat like he did and still look like that

Yolanda and JoJo joined us in the kitchen, just as the purple kettle on the stove started whistling JoJo plucked it off the burner and poured the steas bobbed to the surface, she asked, “Would anyone else like some tea?” Lark and I both declined

Even asse a sandwich see sorabbed a spoon, said goodnight to everyone, and went upstairs I just didn’t have it in me to stick another smile on my face and chat

After I ate at the desk in my room, I took a shower in the shared bathroom at the end of the hall and put on a T-shirt and pajaot comfortable on the built-inseat

My bedroom was at the front of the house, which meant it had the sa the street Between the above the front porch, the pink Victorian was a great, big beacon of queerness, and I loved that Growing up, I’d believed I had to hide who I was No wonder this house felt liberating

I pushed aside the curtains and looked out at the street Unlike the section with all the bars, this part of the Mission was perfectly still That meant there wasn’t aze on the view as my mind wandered

Another birthday was in the books, and I felt a little disappointed That was ridiculous though, because the whole day had gone exactly as planned I’d tolddeal of it, and that I wanted it to feel like any other day Well, mission accomplished

I sighed and lightly thuainst the pane I hated this The last thing I wanted was to feel sorry fora lot of that lately Yolanda was right, I’d been sad and lonely ever since the two most important people in my life became a couple, but it was time to shake it off and move on

What I really needed was to start dating, or at least having sex It had been a while—longer than I cared to admit, actually

Eden had spentwe’d been friends, and al-ter that, I’dI’d told le and I couldto realize the truth was more complicated than that

I was still trying to work out how much of that crush had been real, and how much I’d just built him up as a fantasy—one that definitely had served a purpose As long as I told myself he hat I really wanted, I’d had the perfect excuse for avoiding real relationships and never co to anyone

Noas tirabbedapp that came to mind, and clicked on “new account” I couldn’t believe I was actually doing this, since it was totally outsidea step forward, and that was so

Chapter 2

The next y out for two hours, which I did six days a week Some people centered thehts I loved all of it—the routine, the repetitions, the ongoing challenge to do ood workout did