Page 21 (1/2)
Just after her fortieth birthday, in thea shrink, a woman who specialized in a new psychoanalytropic approach called life adjustment The shrink was a pretty, mature woman in her late thirties with the smooth skin of a beauty devotee; she wore a brown pencil skirt with a leopard-print shirt and open-toed Manolo Blahnik puirl and was recently divorced “What do you want, Mindy?” she’d asked in a flat, down-to-basics, corporate tone of voice “If you could have anything, ould it be? Don’t think, just answer”
“A baby,” Mindy said “I’d like another baby A little girl” Before she’d said it, Mindy had had no idea as ailing her “Why?” the shrink asked Mindy had to think about her answer “I want to share myself With someone” “But you have a husband and a child already Isn’t that so?” “Yes, but my son is ten” “You want life insurance,” said the shrink “I don’t knohat youto need you in ten years When your son has graduated frohed “He’ll always needI can’t win?” “You can win Anyone can win if they knohat they want and they focus on it And if they’re willing to make sacrifices I always tell my clients there are no free shoes” “Don’t you mean patients?” Mindy had asked “They’re clients,” the shrink insisted “After all, they’re not sick”
Mindy was prescribed Xanax, one pill every night before bedtime to cut down on her anxiety and poor sleep habits (she awoke every night after four hours of sleep and would lie awake for at least two hours, worrying), and was sent to the best fertility specialist in Manhattan, who preferred high-profile patients but would take those reco, he had recommended prenatal vitamins and a bit of luck Mindy kneouldn’t work because she wasn’t lucky Neither she nor James ever had been
After two years of increasingly coave up She’d tallied their o on
“I can count the days I’ve been truly content on one hand,” Mindy wrote now “Those are bad nuht so important, it’s in our Constitution But maybe that’s the key It’s the pursuit of happiness, not the actual acquisition of it that matters”
Mindy thought back to her Sunday in the Haone for a walk on the beach, and she’d carried Sidney as they labored in the soft sand above the waterline The houses, set behind the dunes, were enormous, triumphant testimonials to what some men could achieve and what others could not In the afternoon, back at the house, Redame
Catherine and Mindy sat on the porch, watching the men “It’s a beautiful day, isn’t it?” Catherine said for the tenth time
“It’s areed
Catherine squinted at the men on the lawn “Sam is so cute,” Catherine said
“He’s a good-looking boy,” Mindy said proudly “But Jaer”
“He’s still attractive,” Catherine said kindly
“You’re very nice, but he isn’t,” Mindy said Catherine looked startled “I’m one of those people on’t lie to herself,” Mindy explained “I try to live with the truth”
“Is that healthy?” Catherine asked
“Probably not”
They sat in silence for a moment The men moved cluinning of real age, and yet Mindy envied theness to pursue joy “Are you happy with Redmon?” she said