Page 38 (1/2)

She rolled her chair around the table and came toward me

"You've got to be careful when it coan

I smiled I was just thirteen

"I knohat you're thinking You think you have plenty of time to worry about romance, but believe me, you don't Not you You're special I don't want you to turn your brain into Jell-0 with silly lovesickness It's distracting and thisyou sahat distraction can do"

She drew closer until ere gazing into each other's eyes

"Sex draws on your creative energies, Janet It can drain you," she explained "When I was dancing and approaching the peak of my development, I refrained fro time, we even slept in separate rooms," she added

I didn't say anything and I didn't move I don't think I even blinked

"I had e' she continued, "but I didn't have tiirl crushes You won't either so don't encourage any" She started to wheel herself away and stopped "Tomorrow," she said, "we'll try to make up for today"

She leftafter her "Make up for today?" She made it sound as if my birthday and my birthday party were a total inconvenience

I had a grandmother who didn't really want me and a mother who only wanted me so that I could be the dancer she couldn't be

No, Josh, I thought, ine

Outside, the sky turned darker The rain began and the drops that hit the

s looked like heaven's tears

Eleven

Once Celine and I began working weekends on ray dancing, it becaular part of my schedule A nus: day trips, shopping, movie matinees, or just a ride and dinner in a nice restaurant Celine not only rejected his suggestions; she beca them