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It’s not fair

“It’s my senior year—how am I supposed to study in this house?” I take a deep breath “You could hire someone to help with Aunt Myrtle and Alex A nanny for them both”

Mood, can you iine I don’t knoould run a nanny off first, your brother or your auntie”

“One hundred percent it would be Aunt Myrtle and her parade of geriatric boyfriends”

“Please” Mohter “Do not reave her piña coladas and wine and she wound up puking on the living rooht her home”

“What?” I shout, shocked and horrified “Wait—what? Rewind”

“She went out with this younger gentleht He took her to a tiki bar, and it didn’t sit ith her”

“What?”

“She’s still trying to party like it’s 1999, and it came up both ends”

“That’s not even funny” Well, it kind of is, but in a weird, I’ kind of way

“No one is laughing It was horrendous Your father about had a heart attack, and I made him help clean up the entleolf cart dealership while we cleaned the carpets”

“I don’t even knohat to say to that”

“Nothing You say nothing It’s been a revolving door of gray-haired singlea field day with it all I don’t kno a caregiver could e your brother”

Which is where I come in “But Mom…”

“I’ll have to talk to your dad, but I guess it wouldn’t hurt for you to text your friend’s brother and see where he’s at with his spare room”

I want to fist-pue to restrain myself until Mom leaves the room

“And maybe if you live by campus, you’ll meet someone”

Meet soirl? “That’s not the reason I want to move and be closer to school, Mom”

Girls are distracting, and I have goals

Mom pats me on the ar out loud”

That’s all anyone in this house does—thinks out loud

2

LILLY

Kyle cheated