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At first, the tranquility inside this Irish castle was cal—a much-needed break from the ind of the past teeks—but now restlessness has caught up within the name of rest

Why did I leave? I should have fought to the death for what’s mine What am I, a coward?

“You did the right thing, colass of bourbon “Whatever’s going on in Cali isn’t like anything I’ve ever seen before You can’t deal with so like that alone”

“I should be able to do anything I want on itation in ht htly against a largeand a fire crackles in front of us My untouched glass of Irish whiskey sits on the darkany alcohol until I figure this all out “I’ve always been alone before, what’s the difference now?”

“You irl?” Cyrus teases

Anyone else ht have caused me to fly off the handles, but I know Cyrus doesn’tbad by it He was always the Casanova back in school; he knohat it’s like to fall for someone, even if he doesn’t know the whole story behind me and Catalina

“If it wasn’t for the girl, I’d already be dead,” I grumble

“How so?”

I huff out the anger building inside of s had been captured, that they were being burned to the ground, a part of me just wanted to say fuck it; rush back into the city with lory The curiosity of finding out who’s been behind this all disappeared, coe but I couldn’t leave Catalina like that She’s involved in this, too, and she h, but she’s not like ged her into” I instinctively reach for lass, but think better of it I’ the truth

“That’s what a good girl will do for you,” Cyrus nods “She’ll keep you alive”

I lean back in e of my nose The Irishman means well, but he should know better than anybody that, in our profession, it’s often better to feel like you’re already dead The dead are cold and remorseless, but Catalina’s war more and more of my defences every day

It’s why I’ve been trying to keep her at ar, it’s too painful, too distracting The ice needs to freeze back over ht never have the guts to do what needs to be done

Cyrus’s phone buzzes on the table between us and he casually picks it up I let hi with his own proble his ranks, too, but it’s not nearly as bad as mine I should be happy for him, but it only serves to make me feel all the more pitiful

He can deal with his homestead, but mine has been burned to ashes? We’ve always been on equal footing before, so what’s changed? Is it ainst someone that’s my equal or worse, my superior?

I dig ht that I’ve let anyone get the better of me