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“ ‘But Louis,’ he said, ‘you haven’t tried!’ ”
The va the boy And the boy, astonished, said nothing
“It was true what he’d said I had not drunk enough; and shaken by the girl’s fear, I let him leadnow from the Conde Street ballroom, and the narrow street was jammed There were supper parties in the hotels, and the planter fareat nuony was unbearable Never since I was a hu had I felt such mental pain It was because all of Lestat’s words had made sense to me I knew peace only when I killed, only for thatof anything less than a hu, the discontent which had brought lass I was no vampire And in my pain, I asked irrationally, like a child, Could I not return? Could I not be huirl arth, I asked that question The faces of hu on dark waves I was sinking into the darkness I eary of longing I was turning around and around in the street, looking at the stars and thinking, Yes, it’s true I knohat he is saying is true, that when I kill there is no longing; and I can’t bear this truth, I can’t bear it
“Suddenly there was one of those arresting moments The street was utterly quiet We had strayed far from the main part of the old town and were near the rahts, only the fire in aand the far-off sound of people laughing But no one here No one near us I could feel the breeze suddenly fro and Lestat near , lo of pointed roofs were thefor stars The pain for the one I closedsoftly, swiftly in the river It was enough, for one moment And I knew that it would not endure, that it would fly away fro torn out of my arms, and I would fly after it, et it back And then a voice beside ht, a dru, ‘Do what it is your nature to do This is but a taste of it Do what it is your nature to do’ And the irl in the parlor in the hotel, dazed and ready for the slightest suggestion I was nodding at Lestat as he nodded at me ‘Pain is terrible for you,’ he said ‘You feel it like no other creature because you are a vao on’
“ ‘No,’ I answered hihtless, caught as if by a dance’
“ ‘That and htened on mine ‘Don’t turn away from it, come with me’
“He ledevery time I hesitated, his hand out for mine, a sht he’d come in my mortal life and told me ould be vampires ‘Evil is a point of view,’ he whispered now ‘We are immortal And e have before us are the rich feasts that conscience cannot appreciate and ret God kills, and so shall we; indiscriminately He takes the richest and the poorest, and so shall we; for no creatures under God are as we are, none so like Hi lidoht I am like a mother… I want a child!’
“I should have knohat he meant I did not He hadto, ‘Your pain will end’
“We’d co houses, sailors, flatboat men We entered a narrow door; and then, in a hollow stone passage in which I could hearthe wall until his shadow leapt out in the light of a doorway beside the shadow of another ether, their whispers like the rustling of dry leaves ‘What is it?’ I drew near him as he came back, afraid suddenly this exhilaration in htmare landscape I’d seen when I spoke with Babette; I felt the chill of loneliness, the chill of guilt ‘She’s there!’ he said ‘Your wounded one Your daughter’
“ ‘What do you say, what are you talking about!’
“ ‘You’ve saved her,’ he whispered ‘I knew it You left the ide on her and her dead ht her here’
“ ‘The child The little girl!’ I gasped But he was already leadingward of wooden beds, each with a child beneath a narrohite blanket, one candle at the end of the ward, where a nurse bent over a small desk We walked down the aisle between the rows ‘Starving children, orphans,’ he said ‘Children of plague and fever’ He stopped I saw the little girl lying in the bed And then thewith Lestat; such care for the sleeping little ones So The nurse rose and hurried away
“And now the doctor bent and wrapped the child in the blanket Lestat had taken money from his pocket and set it on the foot of the bed The doctor was saying how glad he e’d come for her, how most of them were orphans; they ca even to tell which body was that of their ht Lestat was the father
“And in h the streets with her, the white of the blanket gleaainst his dark coat and cape; and even to my expert vision, as I ran after hiht with no one holding it, a shifting shape traveling on the wind like a leaf stood upright and sent scurrying along a passage, trying to gain the wind all the while and truly take flight I caught him finally as we approached the lamps near the Place d’Armes The child lay pale on his shoulder, her cheeks still full like pluh she was drained and near death She opened her eyes, or rather the lids slid back; and beneath the long curling lashes I saw a streak of white ‘Lestat, what are you doing? Where are you taking her?’ I de for the hotel and meant to take her into our room
“The corpses were as we left them, one neatly set in the coffin as if an undertaker had already attended her, the other in her chair at the table Lestat brushed past them as if he didn’t see them, while I watched him in fascination The candles had all burned down, and the only light was that of theprofile as he set the child down on the pillow ‘Coh, I know you haven’t,’ he said with the sa He held ht ‘See her, Louis, how plump and sweet she looks, as if even death can’t take her freshness; the will to live is too strong! He ht make a sculpture of her tiny lips and rounded hands, but he cannot make her fade You remember, the way you wanted her when you saw her in that room’ I resisted hiht And then suddenly I reony: I reainst ered for it so badly I turned my back on her in the bed and would have rushed out of the room had not Lestat held me fast; and I remembered her mother’s face and that moment of horror when I’d dropped the child and he’d come ‘You want her, Louis Don’t you see, once you’ve taken her, then you can take whoht but you weakened, and that’s why she’s not dead’ I could fe