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“Nothing,” I said, leaping off the couch, desperately wanting to close the gap between us “I swear There’s nothing else”

I hadn’t even stepped any closer and Herald had already backed away He wanted so badly to physically distance himself from me, and it hurt that much more

“You know that I would kill for you,” he said “Do anything to protect you I would freeze the world if it meant that you would be safe from harm Instead I helped you find one of the swords that were ”

My hand lifted, andto do, or to say, but nothing came My arms fell to my sides “I’m sorry,” I said

The soft, yellow light of Herald’s apart it difficult to see his eyes just then, but instinctively, I kneasn’t angry anyain I’d never seen him cry I’d never meant to make him cry

“I think you should go,” he said quietly, his voice harder than it should be

“Herald, please, we should talk this – ”

“You want to talk this out now?” He hadn’t raised his voice at all, but the words sliced me like a knife “After I’ve already helped you take another step towards your own doo This isn’t the tio”

I picked up ainst the floor I felt likebesidefor me to leave I almost bent in to touch him – to kiss hi – but every inch I moved towards him, he moved away farther

“I’ else left to say

As Herald slowly shut the door, I saw the first tear fall “I’m sorry, too”

Chapter 20

We didn’t talk after that Herald didn’t answer any of the five text es I’d sent him, but neither did I expect him to I’d done too much, asked tooas stupid as finding Bastion attractive, when it turned out I was hiding far worse things from him

On purpose? I suppose it was How do you tell someone that your entire existence has been funneled towards one horrific, ultimate act? That there’s no other choice but to sacrifice yourself in the an with the Eldest, with Thea, with the Dark Roo to end, where everything was going to end

But it was selfish to keep Herald out of it, to keep my father