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We wait inside the chilly interior of the car while the e from the plane and load it into the trunks It looks like Marusya indeed packed for several or shifts into the front passenger seat of our car while Yuri takes the wheel

The engine starts up As the car rolls forward smoothly, the finality of the situation sinks in, followed by a wave of nauseating fear

We’re here

There’s no turning back

The car picks up speed, transporting me to an unknown future

2

Kate

The drive passes in silence I stare at the scenery through the tinted , taking in the aparts We follow a broad river for several nposts are in Russian I have no idea where we’re heading, and the uncertainty adds to my fear

As if readingto Krestovsky Island”

I have no desire to look at hiaze to him in a reflexive reaction

“I realize this is all new and strange to you,” he continues “If you want to know anything, you only have to ask”

One question runs on repeat through o home?”

The tall buildings throw shadows over the road that intersperse with the bright winter afternoon sun They play over his face as we speed along, h lines etched from his nose to his mouth appear deeper

“Katyusha,” he says after a tense beat “I’ to be patient, but don’t push me Not on this”

“Fine” I shrug “Why don’t you just tell me what you want me to say? It’ll make the road forward considerably smoother for both of us”