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“I don’t want to know if there’s nothing after this world, that rave I choose to believe the essence of her lives on, if not in e call heaven, then at least… I don’t know, hanging around here, watching over arden It’s hard forIt’s actually eerie when I try Not s make me unco nothingness—that, piccolina, freaks me the fuck out, if you will,” I admit with a chuckle

She nods, her lips pursing as she nibbles the inside of her cheek “I get that I feel like I’ve been stuck in a sort of purgatory allBut it is odd to try to i at the lid of your coffin, because even that is soht There’s gotta be soone Otherwise, what’s the point of all this? I believe e do in this life is a test, and o to so-called heaven, oror someone else Or if ere really bad, maybe that’s when there’s no second chance or choice, and that’s when hell comes into play”

I think over her words, applying theh “Where do you think I’d go, sweet Bella?”

She pondersto truly think about her answer before she speaks “I think you’d get the second chance You spend your days doing all you can to save the lives of the sick, and then at night, you take the lives of evildoers Inyou in a neutral position You don’t get into heaven, but you don’t go to hell You have to retake your test, doctor” She gives me a small smile

“And what about you?” I ask, takingthe tip down her pert nose

She sighs “I’ for a do-over Because this life… this life sucked I don’t knohat I did in my past life to deserve this shittiness, but hopefully because I haven’t done anyone harm in all my years, I’ll at least co”

A laugh bubbles out of , and it bounces her head that’s still using hed like this, if ever This woman has been in ht ht than I’ve felt in all my life

If this conversation is anything to go by, we could talk about anything and everything, never tiring of diving into deep topics just for the hell of it I’ve never had that with anyone before, and it ood for me Not just because I want her beyond reason, and not just because I’m completely and utterly obsessed with her and crave to keep her as mine, but because I feel like I could learn a lot aboutto her about ht about before

“I ain “You, piccolina, make me want to be a better man I never cared ood or evil, but in this ive you a better life A life so good you’ll forget the first two decades… ‘sucked,’ as you so articulately put it” She swats my chest, but the drea doesn’t disappear “And wanting to make someone else as happy as I want to ood”

She ss, blinking away the glossiness in her eyes Her words are a whisper “No, that can’t be anything but good But… you’ll still be on neutral ground if you continue your role in The Ruin”

My hand pauses h her hair In all this ti” froine intountil my time on earth came to an end What I do outside the hospital doesn’t take brute strength, so I could potentially continue euthanizing deserving villains until I’ray