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In fact, I loved how those little blue pills —which isn’t very different fro is sowith

I suppose it’s why they weaned me off them “Addict” wasn’t exactly a labelelse that rong with me

My point is…I did it all I tried

It’s just hard to succeed at soet better for my parents, I can’t make myself care Not even for them My therapist says I need to care for myself first

And therein lies the problem The catch-22 I just don’t care anymore Not really

Yet there are moments where, if I try real hard, I can close my eyes and smell the rain Not just any rain, o afternoon

Gram’s rain

“Monroe, I’?”

I turned as Gram walked into the kitchen It was nearly noon and I had been sitting at the table for about an hour, trying to decide if I was going to eat the bowl of pears she’d put out for e

I liked pears I liked thery

“Uh, I think I’ll stick around here, if that’s okay with you”

Gram put her purse on the table, and I pretended not to notice how her eyes lingered on my hair I’d pulled it back in a ponytail yesterday—or maybe it was the day before—because I couldn’t be bothered with it I’m pretty sure I hadn’t brushed it since

She pointed to the bowl in front of rabbing it and setting it on the counter She pulled plastic wrap fro thee

Graainst the counter, and for a moment, we stared at each other in silence

I’d arrived a week earlier and we hadn’t had a real chat yet—the one that I sensed was coht