Page 45 (1/2)

Her eyes flew open, thank God, and I dragged her out of bed, yelling at her

How many did you take?

When did you take them?

How many?

I pleaded with her as I hauled her into the bathroom, and God help me but I cursed her when I shoved her into the tub and ran the shower on the coldest setting possible I held her when she clawed at her nightgown and spit out the water that ran down on her face I et to her feet, and I held her long hair away from her when she started to whimper

“Don’t tell your father Don’t tell your father Don’t tell your father” She repeated it over and over and over, until her voice gave out

She sputtered She cried Great big gulping cries that made my heart pound even harder than it already was Never had I seen my mother like this Never I was scared and upset and so mad that I wanted to screa this to me

The water was still spilling over her, but she didn’t seelassy We were both wet and shivering from fear and adrenaline and a whole bunch of stuff I couldn’t name

“Why?” I whispered “I don’t understand…”

But I did, didn’t I?

She opened her et any words out, she doubled over and moaned

And then she vomited all over my shoes

• • •

“Where’s Isaac?”

The words were raspy, slow I glanced up froer inside er was heavy and hot and so daht that maybe I should let it Just this once Maybe then it wouldn’t feel as if a hundred-pound weight was pressed into my chest