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“Stop,” I finally said, holding one back to Manhattan He’s not my boyfriend, okay?”

Even saying it madehis head

“Sorry My bad It’s just that he’s coht for a hen you worked I wondered where he was, is all”

I closed et control over my emotions

“I’m sorry,” I said and wipedup and I’uess”

“Of course you are,” Steve said and moved closer, his hands on my shoulders He bent down and looked in my eyes “If you need a shoulder to cry on, feel free I’m here for you, Mira Anytime”

I forced a smile I didn’t feel and nodded “Thanks” Then I pulled away, not wanting to feel his touch at that moment I didn’t knohat I wanted – hell, that was a lie I wanted Beckett I wanted to hit hiotsooner I wanted hiether

He was a good hanistan He was funny and sexy and so easy to be with He seemed to be unable to resist me

Was it all just for an easy fuck?

My mind screamed no – that e had was more than just hot sex What we had felt like ut felt sick about it If it had beento ot my letters?

I sat in hthe blood stains on the paper These were the letters I wrote to Dan after ere married and he was deployed with his Special Operations Forces tea to keep our connection alive, even if he couldn’t alrite back He never knehere he’d be sent or what temporary base he’d be billeted in It depended on whaton

My Dearest Dan,

It’s been two months since you left andanother ine another three years of this separation I know this is what I signed up for, but it’s so hard! My only consolation is that you’re doing iuessyou is mine

I’ with your parents Bartending at a beach joint, as your dad calls it, is ramps runs in Queens Tourists are a different crowd than cops and firefighters I ramps, but he understands that your dad needed a bartender and I was there so… I’ve become fast friends with Leah, so that’s nice She keepsat her apart

Enough s and on our honeyood My brain was on pleasure overload after being separated fro cold turkey! No Dan insideI feel e with your parents et to sleep in your old bedroom (love the Star Wars sheets, BTW…I made yourfrilly she bought, but I said, no I was as big a SW freak as you! My only coo back to Manhattan for classes in September, I don’t kno I’ll cope Maybe I’ll have to steal your old Star Wars sheets Seeing you in August will be some consolation