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The tho hadn’t fired did now at al into the thin meat over her ribs It hurt, but the pain was distant She barreled into the closest of theood ar it carefully so that when they landed, she could snap his neck She hit the deck hard, pulled, and felt his spine give way
I have killed But I am not a killer
She caught up the gun from his hand as the others turned Clarissa felt the battle cry in her throat, felt the force of air and sound rattling her trachea Felt the gun she’d stolen kick The woman nearest her fired wild, and Clarissa placed a bullet in the wo her head back That o The one who’d been on Clarissa’s back juh his teeth Three
Nao for pistolhis shattered nose like that was his biggest problem Clarissa shot him twice in the center of mass
There was only one guard left, and he was close to Clarissa She could see down the barrel of his gun She saw the fear in his eyes He fired He couldn’t ave way under her, but she fired a shot on the way down It took the last guard in the throat She landed hard, but her blood was still ht and rapture She rolled, knelt Her abdomen ached and it was hard to pull in a full breath Jordao looked at her like he was seeing the devil
No! I’m sorry! he shouted in some universe close to hers
Fuck your sorry Sorry doesn’t fix shit She didn’t know if she’d yelled or if it was just in her head Either way, she shot him—once in the belly and when he doubled over, the crown of his head right where a little bald spot was just starting Then the rush was over
It wasn’t as bad as she’d re of illness The helplessness The pain But at some point all of that had become familiar, so the experience of it wasn’t as bad Or else she was slipping into shock
Shock, or so like it
Nao down Her uards and the traitor were spread throughout the hallway The air stank of blood and gunpowder It looked like a scene froret, doing quiet penance for the lives she’d ended, and now the only thing she could think was That was fun
Words were happening somewhere nearby Stay with me, Claire She reain She didn’t re them Naomi was spattered with blood, her face pale Ren stood behind her He earing some kind of black robe that made her think of Jesuits
“I’m a monster,” Clarissa said
No you aren’t, baby You’re not a monster You’re not Which meant Naomi had misunderstood Clarissa had meant, I’m not afraid She tried to think what to say that would clarify that, but it was a lot of effort And what did it matter really if anyone else understood? She knew
Fuck it, she thought Sorave
Clarissa Melpomene Mao closed her eyes