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“Why did you have to say that?” She opened her teary eyes to look at him, but he couldn’t uilty, too
“I went crazy at the thought of you leaving ain”
Lorna shivered with the sensation that it was ; it was his ability to feel deeply as well His sexual abuse had left her with loathing, but hate didn’t describe what she felt toward hih she couldn’t have said she still loved him either It was all too brutally fresh for Lorna to assess the das toward him
Only one other time had she seen Benteen come so close to the violent hatred he had just displayed She had thought he was going to strike her on that occasion when she had rescued his mother’s picture from the fire—a mother who had left him, as she had threatened to do
Lorna was faced with the knowledge that she was partly responsible for what had happened She had er, but there was never any real possibility that she would have carried it out She had found a way to hurt hi of the consequences Like Benteen, she discovered there was nothing she could say
She sat up, keeping her back to him while she wiped the tears frorassstained skirt He waited silently,no atte down her back and tangling with her sunbonnet
“I’ll help you look for the rose cuttings,” Benteen said
“No I don’t want them” They would always be a re to be difficult enough for theet
They walked together back to the noon caap they both had a hesitant wish to bridge, yet neither kne to begin They separated when they reached the wagons Benteen remounted his horse and rode out to the herd while Lorna clion to fix her hair and think privately
They held the restless cattle through the noonday heat before starting theht the s the herd fro to the river The brindle steer, dubbed Captain after it had led the herd across the Red River, did its part in checking thea steady pace and hooking its long horns at anything that tried to pass him
When they reached the river, it became lined with reatthe wetness into their thirst-craved bodies and waited to drink a little A scant few overdrank and died
While the cattle drank, the trailhands went upstreae of the river to drink their fill Not far away, in plain view of the cary she was for the sight of a building
In caht, she and Benteen said very little to each other beyond as necessary She went to bed early and lay awake a long tion, she didn’t pretend to be asleep, but remained on her side, faced away from him After he’d undressed, he crawled under the quilt She unconsciously stiffened when he accidentally brushed against her Lorna forced herself to relax In the eyes of God, he was her husband “for better or for worse” She rolled over to lie facing hiazed at the canvas ceiling
“We’ll let the herd graze and rest here for a couple of days,” he said “Toe City to restock the supplies”
“There’s a few things I need to buy,” Lorna replied, and realized he was expecting her to reaffir to