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‘Guns, knives, razor blades, drugs, and anything that is against prison regulations I a officer,’ says Mr Weedon, ‘because Mr Cook and Mr Abbott are being tested for the National Vocational Qualification, and this search is part of that test We will start with a strip-search,’ he says, keeping a straight face

I stand in the er T-shirt I then holdasked to turn a coorously through s, just in case you haven’t worked it out This completed, I am allowed to put my T-shirt back on Mr Cook then asks me to take off my shoes, socks, trousers and pants, all of which are carefully exaloves Once again I am asked to turn a full circle before they invite me to lift the soles of ht be concealing drugs There are no plasters, so they tell et dressed

‘I will now acco searched,’ Mr Weedon says ‘But first I s to another prisoner, such as guns, knives or drugs?’

‘Yes, I have an essay written by Tony Croft, and a poee around in a drawer, and hand the them back ‘I a not to ses and shake the book about (Drugs or money this time)

‘I see it’s due back today, Archer, so make sure you return it by lock-up, because ouldn’t want you to be fined, would we’ Mr Weedon scores a point

‘How kind of you to forewarn me,’ I say

‘Before we can begin a thorough search of your cell,’ continues Mr Abbott, ‘I have to ask, are you in possession of any legal papers that you do not wish us to read?’

‘No,’ I reply

‘Thank you,’ says Mr Weedon ‘That completes this part of the exercise Your cell will now be searched by two other officers’

I was told later that this is done simply for their self-protection, so that should they coal, with four officers involved, two sets of two, it becomes a lot uv’ and that whatever was found had been planted

‘Burglars!’ I hear shouted by so as if it had come from a nearby cell I look a little surprised that the officers don’t all disappear at speed

Mr Weedon smiles ‘That’s us,’ he says ‘We’ve been spotted, and it’s just another prisoner warning hisexpeditions, so they’ll have enough ti You’ll hear several toilets being flushed during the next fewthrown out of the ’

Mr Abbott and Mr Cook leave in to search my cell

Mr Weedon escortsroom on the other side of the spur and locks me in Bored, I stroll over to theon the far side of the rooarden A dozen or so prisoners are planting, cutting, and weeding for a pound an hour The in yellow Day-Glo jackets, while the one supervisor is dressed casually in blue jeans and an open-necked shirt It’s a neat, well-kept garden, but then so would anyone’s be, if they had a dozen gardeners at a pound an hour

I ae with a large pair of shears, quite theat Belularly