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that way, each a little rougher than the one before After the last ti away fro yell at her, then say I’m sorry and let her pick out theHenry
Nate won’t answer any of ure he’s fucked up or maybe mad at me for Laurent—that is, if he’s heard already
I stay up all night, paranoid as shit that I’ll get found out for Laurent and sent to fucking jail or so I can’t sleep I can’t breathe, and I dropped the Xanax that was in my pocket, maybe at Laurent’s place
That’s why I walk back toI leave Ms Keller a note, calling her Rachel and saying I’
Walking across campus to my place, I realize what they told ra withlike this No way Laurent keeps getting
I feel just a little better as I open updeal Now that I know there’s a problem with the Xanax, I can stop it—easy
Soure out what Maybe it’s just ie fro What a fucking addict Then I strip my bloody clothes off, open up the bathroom door to bury them at the bottom of my hamper
That’s how I find Nate He’s slumped over on the padded bench that lines the bathroom’s back ith a belt around his ar around his cold, bare feet
Two
Finley
Doctor has a wardrobe full of yellows, greens, and reds I stand in the closet adjoining the h his shirts I suppose he’d never be caught wearing gray or black or dark blue
I bring the heht, soft scent of washing soap
Here is a rasp I could have his babies, serve the people here, and help er Yes, he’s puritanical and patriarchal, but I can’t live with that? Mu off, as I’ve dreaivenand always did her best for me
I wander out of the closet and curl up in bed, and I don’t leave until it’s time to make two house calls After that, I scurry back to Doctor’s and soak in the bath I’d like to cry, but I feel nothing
I re and try to sear his touch, his lips, his voice into my memory