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For fuck’s sake

The tension in ht, but I finally looked up at hihtly, a glass in his hand with clear liquid filling it, liquid I kneasn’t water He had one ar over the back of his chair, his focus trained on me I actually shivered I had no idea why thisit aside

There was no ignoring it or trying to act like I had a handle on anything I didn’t My life was so messed up at thethe sexual kind, shouldn’t have even been a blip in my mind

“I have to leave after dinner to do so in the air, and I didn’t respond because I kneasn’t finished He slowly took a long drink of his vodka and then set the glass on the table, keeping his hand wrapped around it, his index finger slowly tapping against the side in an almost hypnotic way

“Okay,” I said a little too breathily and then felt lass of red wine, the exact opposite of what I should’ve been drinking After I took a drink and set the glass back on the table, a heavy weight of silence moved between us

“I don’t have to ask that you stay in the apartht?” His voice was low and fir as possible And although this erous on every level, I kneouldn’t hurt me

Stupid, stupid girl

“I’ll stay in the house, because I know it’s dangerous, but we do need to discussto work tomorrow”

He didn’tof his jaw after I spoke

“We’ll talk about it,” he said, and noas ether, because his tone felt strangely like he’d only said the words to placate me

I wanted to instantly lash out I didn’t need another father And although one, I also didn’t need anybody to look after me I could do that myself No one could take care of me better than me

So although I wanted to stay on the subject, because that’s what I did—fight—how I survived, I had to pick and choose ht, and I felt safe here With Arlo He was helpingme how to protect myself But I did repeat in et answers from him one way or another Eventually

It was another twenty minutes before I finally finished my dinner I’d never eaten so well than when I ith Arlo, that was for sure I’d never been full, always feeling that sliver of hunger biting at the edge

And the entire ti, Arlo had watched me As if he couldn’t take his eyes off ht there was so with s I felt toward hihten and my heart flutter, couldn’t handle rejection, not with the way

I finished offa little heavier than normal

“Co” He stood and walked past me, and I had no choice but to follow

Weroom to the other side, where the shadows see didn’t penetrate He stopped at a sliding glass door I hadn’t even noticed, it was so seamless with the rest of the s

When he pulled it open, the night air washed in, teasing the strands of ood,whenever I was near him We stepped out onto the balcony, and I felt the breath leave me at the scenic view in front

Although the city had been gorgeous on the other side of the s, as I walked toward the balcony and curled e, it now seemed so surreal

The banister wasthe illusion that you were closer to falling over the edge than you really were It hadIt made me feel alive