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Jude looked up at her son, whose eyes were bright with tears He looked like her boy again, her golden Zach, and in that irl who’d worn her heart on her sleeve and been the best friend Mia had ever had She reirl from the trailer park who had never known a mother’s love and yet always had a so well today with Lexi and Grace Lexi screwed up ”
“What do you mean?”
“She went too quickly, pushed Grace before she was ready ”
“She doesn’t kno to be a mom How could she?”
“No one does,” Jude said quietly “I remember how overwhelmed I felt by you and … Mia ”
“You were a great mom ”
Jude couldn’t look at hih I haven’t acted like yourtiht…” She paused and forced herself to look at hih I know I shouldn’t And I blamed Lexi And myself ”
“It wasn’t your fault We knew better … that night,” he said
Jude felt a searing pain in her heart at the reminder It was the kind of pain that had always been a barrier before, soh it
“You’re right,” she said softly “You shouldn’t have drunk that night, but Lexi shouldn’t have driven, and I shouldn’t have let you go I knew there was going to be drinking there What was I thinking to trust drunk eighteen-year-olds to make wise decisions? Why did I just assu? And … Mia should have had her seatbelt on There’s blao around ”
“It’s h Jude had heard hiht of his burden for the first tirief that she’d let her son carry his alone
She went to him, took him by the hand, and pulled him to his feet “We all carry this, Zach We’ve carried it for so long it’s reshaped our spines, bent us We have to stand up again We have to forgive ourselves ”
“How?” he asked siotten that sorief; her babies were twins, and Mia would always be alive in Zac
h And now there was Grace, too
She put a hand on his face, seeing the faint scar along his jawline “She’s there … in you,” she said gently “How did I forget that?”