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She ca it clatter to the pavement behind her On either side of her, trees blocked out the sun

The memorial to Mia was tattered now, only visible if you knehat to look for The s seasons and stood drunkenly to the left Here and there e lih branch

She released her breath in a long, shaky sigh

In prison, she’d spent years in group therapy, talking about the pain, the remorse Her counselor had told her often that time and hard ould heal her That she would be whole when she could forgive herself

As if

Even if she could forgive herself, which was inconceivable, it wouldn’t bring Mia back That hat all those positive thinkers didn’t get: soht If Lexi became Mother Teresa, Mia would still be dead and it would still be Lexi’s fault It had been six years, and still Lexi prayed to Mia every night Everyshe woke to a split second of joy and then the pulverizing reality It was that sense of loss that had caused her to turn to Valium for a few years, but ultimately she’d discovered that you could run fro she should have known already, a lesson she should have learned froly truth—that she was beco the Valium She was so clean now she hardly even took aspirin The only real answer lay in the courage to see a thing clearly and try to do better Be better

She knelt there a long tierous to be stopped on this curve and not caring If anyone saw her here …

Finally, she got back on the bike and started to ride She alht past the Farraday house, but at the lastdarkness, she could see how different the place looked The garden was untended, the planter boxes were empty

She saw the mailbox: their name was still on it

When a pair of headlights shone at her, she jumped on the bike and rode away From a safe distance, she watched a silver Porsche turn into the driveway behind her

Miles

Sighing, she rode back into town and bought dinner at a fast-food place At Scot’s office, she locked up the bike and went inside through the back door In the conference room, she found a red floral sofa bed with a neat pile of white sheets set on the cushion Beside the sheets lay a manila envelope

She picked up the envelope Below it, stuck to the cushion, was a pink Post-it note

Lexi—She’s in kindergarten Morning class

F Y I