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Silence descended between us until the only sounds in the roo on her bottle When she finished, Eli handed the bottle to ainst his shoulder and burped her I was about to offer to take her to put her in the crib, but soaze stopped me

I’d seen him in the hours after the acquittal and he’d been an absolute mess And physically, he still looked co down at the baby made me think that he needed this moment of peace

Just like I’d needed the peace I’d knoould only find in Jace’s arms

“I’m sorry, Eli,” I said “I shouldn’t have just left like that”

Willa had grabbed onto Eli’s finger, so he let her hold it as her eyes drifted shut His eyes shifted to me “Why did you?” he asked

I dropped uess,” I said softly

“To get away from us?” he asked

“What?” I said in surprise, lifting aze “No… no, not at all I just…” I snapped my mouth shut and turned to look out theI stared at the view of the water for aof your testimony I could hear it in your voice”

I chanced a glance at Eli He was the one staring out the

“It was like it was happening all over again, wasn’t it?” I asked

Eli nodded and I saw a tear slip froht I’d prepared , but between the questions and Jack staring at ht back there, you know?”

I nodded and dropped my eyes “It was still justabout it on that tape,” I admitted “I’d never let myself think about what it was like for you That’s why I never wanted to talk to you about it It made it all more real Does that make sense?”

“It does,” Eli acknowledged “But if I’ve learned anything, it’s that not talking about it won’t o away It’ll just destroy you from the inside out”

Ito deal with it?”