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Tate and I began walking towards the exit and I didn’tmy way He also kept his hand on one of Matty’s shoes as if that would so off with the kid Even without the burden of carrying Matty, Tate’s pace was still slow and it took uslot next to the hospital Tate hadn’t even realized our destination until I fished around my pocket for the keys and unlocked the sedan

“No,” Tate immediately said as he tried to take Matty froainst the car and he instantly ceased his struggles – probably so he wouldn’t wake his son up With Matty’s body blocking hiainst the car on his other side, Tate began breathing erratically as he realized I was once again in control It was exactly the position I wanted to be in, but seeing Tate’s fear for his child hadmyself and the reason I’d returned to San Francisco

Don’t

I closed my eyes as the soft word penetrated nored the voice and said, “Get in the car, Tate”

The betrayal in Tate’s eyes was instant and sharp and bothered e to gentle h to allow Tate to open the door He glanced around the e his eyes and reaching behind hirab the door handle The second he was in the back seat, I handed Matty to hiet back out as I cliet Matty buckled in and then he sat next to hiainst his side

We didn’t speak as I pulled the car into traffic and to my complete surprise, Tate fell asleep within tenthe hospital But his arm never left Matty’s small shoulders as he kept hilances in the rearview h it had only been a little over a week since I’d last seen him, he looked even worse than he had when I’d confronted hiauntness to it that ht and there were dark s well Even in sleep, his entire countenance was drawn up tight with tension and I doubted that it was only because of my presence

Another wave of guilt went through me as I forced my attention back to the road Tate didn’t stir even after I pulled the car to a stop in front of his apartently shook him awake that he reacted like a startled anihter around Matty and used his body to cover the still sleeping boy I sed hard as theto wrap myself up like that washed over e wasn’t a factor when your self-preservation instincts kicked in As afraid of me as Tate was, I suspected his reaction in that moment hadn’t been about me at all

“Tate, we’re here,” I said quietly, but I didn’t put my hands back on him

Tate didn’tseconds and I didn’t rush hiet control of himself; never an easy task when you were scared shitless about where the next bloould hit you It was several long seconds before Tate finally looked over his shoulder at me and I could see the remnants of sleep still held hi me into focus Then he checked toaround at our surroundings

“What…what are we doing here?” he asked as he began the process of unbuckling Matty As he climbed out of the car, Matty in his arms, he said, “We…we don’t live here anymore”

“I knoas all I said as I went to the trunk of the car I keptandas I came back around the car

“You were in our et out

“That place was a shit hole,” I said as I once again put“Makes this place look like the fucking Ritz,” I added as alked up the ay towards the apart