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What is winning? I spent a lot of ti that question when I was in therapy I had to come back not just physically, butto rehab was a win Putting ain to play was a win I’ve always defined winning as numbers on a scoreboard, but I see it more broadly now

Ithat makes me happy Gia immediately pops into io, but I still clearly re her play I sat at a table on the far side of the rooood view of her I played shit poker for two hours, but it orth every cent to watch her

She’s good at what she does Gia wins quietly, her expression the same whether she wins or loses When she’s at a poker table, she’s in a bubble, ignoring everything but the gaht tried to make conversation, but she hardly responded and never looked at him

We haven’t been able to get together since that night for breakfast, but we’ve texted The last few days, I’ve been tight on ht Much as I’d love to play poker just to be in the saht, though, and we should be able to get breakfast after the next , which is a Sunday

Even when Gia loses a big hand, she keeps playing I lost the biggest hand ofup If I can’t play at the level I used to, it won’t be because I didn’t give it everything I’ve got

Bear coame talk He’s a hell of a coach, but he’s not exactly a poet

“Go out there and play your fucking balls off, boys,” he says at the end of his speech “Show them this is our ice”

It’s almost time to make our way out to the ice Even from inside the locker roo franchise gary for a team to be proud of

The guys look at ht ofmy thumb over the lucky spot on the end of ame

I’ve gone through lots of sticks as a hockey player, but every ti I do is write en—near the end of the stick I cover it with a strip of clear tape to keep the letters protected Though I lost my mom to colon cancer when she was thirty-six and I was thirteen, she’s with ht now, but all I have are these letters I’ my thumb over

I clear as has a hockey teah we’re unproven, those people are out there screauys yell and put their sticks in the air

It wasn’t the best pep talk ever given, but it’ll do I do ain on the way out to the ice, blood whooshing through htheaded

Tonight, I need to show the world I’en

Everything about this arena is new There are no ood or bad But when I step onto the ice—left skate first, as always—there’s an ingrained faa else

I wave to the cheering fans as the prega theo Blaze tonight, a seasoned tea to have to coainst them

As the puck drop approaches, the distractions around ns they’re waving I focus only on —I’m ready I worked hard for this moment

“Hey, man,” Anton Petrov, the Blaze captain, nods at me “Welcome back”

“Thanks”

The seconds it takes for the ref to drop the puck feel like hours Finally, the clock is running and I’ain

We win the face-off, but within a o has stolen the puck frooal Bear is screa, his blood pressure high