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Chapter 1—Lose the Control

In

No want, no need, no pain

I was just…happy

Why wouldn’t I be? I didn’t have any reason to feel sad If fact, everything was fine The sun was shining through theand over the part of the couch where ht danced around on my skin I could feel it intensely, but it wasn’t harsh or burning I stared at it with a big shs and then spilled over my stomach

Everything was different this tiuilt and withdrawal Not this time This time, there wasn’t any downside I wasn’t junk sick in the ht I won I earned enough cash to cover next month’s rent and h

I was pretty sure it was last night anyway It didn’tmattered

When recent h es of Tria’s hair around her shoulders and the way she sainst nore

Everything we had done together no longer mattered The memories of the dinners she had cooked for us, the walks we had taken to the little tree, and the way she’d run her fingers through my hair were irrelevant It didn’t matter that she had been so beautiful, so sweet, and so accepting of me

It didn’t matter that I’d screwed up in the most profound of ways It didn’tI swore I’d never do to another wonant Tria’s stubbornness and lack of understanding about the danger she was in didn’tthat she had left me didn’t matter

Nothing mattered except the next fix

I blinked, and the room was dark