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J atching me intently; his pissed off mood somewhat abated He now knelt in front of Crystal “Hoould you like us to stay for dinner tonight, angel?” he asked as he gently ran his hand over her hair in a soothing gesture, “We could order in your favourite”

He was gentle with her and my heart skipped a beat It reminded me that there was a softer side to J; in there soh biker bullshit

Crystal nodded at him, “My favourite is pizza,” she said in a timid little voice

J so and sit with Madison while Brooke and I organise dinner” His tenderness was killing ry withshit I didn’t know he had in him, and now this; this sweet talk to a child

He stood andCrystal and I alone to talk I hadn’t seen her in over three years but before that we had been al her kids on her own and I was her support, helping her out withback into Crystal’s life now, after three years, I had been worried that she ht not remember me but I was relieved that she did

I took her hand and led her to the couch “Sweetheart, I’m so sorry that I haven’t been here for you Not only now but also for the last couple of years Things happened, and your Mum and I”

She cut ain I knoasn’t you that didn’t want to see reen eyes looked so sad and I could tell that she was close to tears

I nodded, “I need you to know that I am here for you now, baby I won’t leave you alone Do you understand that?”

She started crying and I used every ounce of control to stay strong for her The last thing she needed noas h for the both of us, that I would get her through this I pulled her toher cry Crystal had always been a tough little girl, fiercely independent and I hadn’t seen her cry s up and tried not to let us see what she was going through I think it was her way of coping with all the crazy shit she had witnessed in her life Bec had been as good a otten herself involved with had often brought the crazy to her life and as a result the kids felt it too Having grown up in the club lifestyle myself, I could always see why Crystal shut herself off like that because I had done the same as a child

We sat there quietly,her while she sobbed I wondered if this was the first tio she had her family Now she had no one No one butto protect her In that moment, I knew that I wouldback here; the place I had sworn never to return to

Dinner was strained but Brooke, J and I did our best to keep it friendly for Crystal’s sake After dinner weroom and watched some television Crystal was subdued and fairly exhausted so Brooke suggested she have a shower and go to bed early She agreed and headed off to the bathroom while Brooke went to clean up the kitchen This left J and I alone, and we sat in silence watching the television I had no idea ere watching becausewith so many questions; not only about Crystal but also about hiry outburst earlier

I looked over at hi me He didn’t break eye contact, just continued to watchanyether I used to be able to read him most of the time but now, over two years later, I had no idea as running through his ht I did He had, after all, told ether again

I finally broke the silence “Have you guys found Nix yet?” I ith an easy question

“No, but Scott’s got a lead so he is chasing that up tonight,” he answered