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Life isn’t alhat you think it’ll be Soet more than you ever dreamed was possible, even if it doesn’t play out the way you expected Life throws curveballs and when you sit and drea in the way of your happiness and that obstacle finally gets ht it’d be

One night just a few days after we gotthe throes of a nightureed to therapy and I don’t know yet if it’s helping or not Right now it al facts and hard truths about hio frorowly the next I hope the old adage of “it gets worse before it gets better” is true because that’ll et better

I also hope I’ve seen the worst already

I’ve tried to reassure him that he had no choice but to shoot his father Tom Sr wanted a shon He wanted to punish his son for his perceived

betrayal and Tom probably would’ve killed me and maybe would’ve killed him, too

But I know Tohtmares that he won’t talk about So in his sleep and he won’t even wake up Soht up, sweaty and hyperventilating and then he doesn’t want to be touched Sometimes he just disappears to the roof terrace to beat on the heavy bag in the ht or swim a dozen laps And sometimes he wakes up and takes h and like his life depends on it Soure out how to help hihts with hi back usually h sex Afterwards, he’s always a bit more himself Sometimes it lasts a few hours, sometimes a few days

Toh shape and then she found out a week after Tonant Tessa and her boysone another heal from the loss of Tom and Tessa’s husband James

Me? I think maybe I need therapy, too My father, poor excuse for one that he is, the ht it’d buy hi shot… he’s still incarcerated but he’s alive and safe For now Last I heard, anyway

I struggle daily with ine living without To the center of my universe Our relationship isn’t healthy; I know this I also know that I don’t want a life without him in it Hopefully in time we can find our way to a healthier place

Touilty and he’s so protective ofsoo anywhere without him And the sex? Even when it doesn’t coh soets confir in his life Andhiether altruistic either because I get to let go of the crap in my head and for a few minutes I feel totally, utterly, free He takes control and for those few

Soasm because I can feel how much he loves me as it’s etched into his features He worships my body and stares intoet tired of

To to transition the company and the subsidiaries and then once it’s as squeaky clean as it can possibly get, it’s being sold Tommy’s not out of the loop but Dare is hands on They hired a consulting firm to help and he and Tommy talk pretty much daily over the computer

When Toot married on a beach at sunset it was al, exactly what I wanted, staring into the eyes of the man I loved with our toes in the sand and the sky a dozen brilliant colors The only redient was the people from my life before Tommy but I came to terms with the fact that it couldn’t be helped We need to be incognito for now and I would never want to put the people I love in unnecessary danger so that’s how it had to be

I sent the an extended trip and I plan to get word to theht have Tess mail them a letter soon so that it’s not traceable to where I am

Tooodbye before we leftlike he had to do with his fao and I didn’t want to bring the this farown into a different person I’ve known so much fear and seen so much death and I’ve felt so ht and airy lives with that They probably wouldn’t know me anymore They’d look at me and see I’m different and they’d worry Or they’d be sad And if I looked too long at theht be sad for ret won’t help me

To the and then I blurted soot really upset He blames himself for this I blame our fathers I also can’t help but blaave up on s at loose ends and so many questions unanswered and I know she was hurt and sad and depressed but I can’t help but be angry with her for not thinking about how her actions would affect me That’s what mothers are supposed to do --- protect their babies

As for our safety, I was hoping that here we’d have a fresh canvas, a place where we could ot to be looking over his shoulder all the tiot fake identities for us so that we could slip off the grid for a while He knows that there’s a chance that if what he did is suspected there will be people to answer to that are even oes back he’s afraid he’ll just get sucked into the business and have trouble finding his way out of it He says some day we may move back, he’s not sure He kept the far on it once in a while The house his father bought him for his 29th birthday was sold and he sold his brother the condo as Dario was living there anyway

Dario and the girls are all on the path to healing, it seems No one talked about what happened with To like there was nothing but love between the hiically It was tragic It was tragic how he revealed his true nature in his last days on the planet and hurt his fahter her husband and the father of her children, put his son in a position where he had no choice but to fatally shoot him