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THE IMAGINARY GIRLFRIEND

Faculty Brat

In ht--the essay was all-important there--but in my years at the acade else; I showed thee Bennett, my best friend's father The late Mr Bennett was then Chairlish Departer--I needed his help Because I failed both Latin and math, I was required to remain at the academy for an unprecedented fifth year; yet I qualified for a course called English 4W--the "W" stood for Writing of the kind I wanted to do--and in this selective gathering I was urged to be Creative, which I rarely ed to be

In my memory, which is subject to doubt, the star author andteammate Chuck Krulak, as also known as "Brute" and ould become General Charles C Krulak--the Commandant of the Marine Corps and a member of the Joint Chiefs of Staff No less a presence, and as sarcastic a critic as the future General Krulak, was lish 5, the future writer G W S Trow; he was just plain George then, but he was as sharp as a ferret--I feared his bite It was only recently, when I was speaking with George, that he surprised e had always strucktoo confident to be unhappy--whereas my own state of mind at the time was one of perpetual embarrassment

I could never have qualified for Exeter through normal admissions procedures; I was a weak student--as it turned out, I was dyslexic, but no one knew this at the time Nevertheless, I was autoory of faculty child My father taught in the History Departes and Literature at Harvard--he was the first to teach Russian History at Exeter I initiated a heightened level of intrafa in his Russian History course Dad rewarded me with a C+

To say that Exeter was hard for me is an understatement I was the only student in my Genetics class who failed to control his fruit-fly experi so rapidly that I lost track of the generations; I atte fountain outside the lab--not knowing that fruit flies could live (and breed) for days in the water pipes When the unusable drinking fountain was declared "conta et fruit flies--I crawled forth and made my confession

I was forgiven by Mr Mayo-Sht Genetics, because I was the only townie (a resident of Exeter) in any of his classes ned a gun; the biologist neededstudents, quite understandably, were not allowed firearms But as a New Hampshire native--"Live Free or Die," as the license plates say--I had an arsenal of weapons at ist used y class with pigeons I used to shoot theist's barn Fortunately, Mr Mayo-Smith lived some distance from town

Yet even in my capacity as Mr Mayo-Seons killed immediately after they'd eaten; that way the students who dissected them could examine the food contained in their crops And so I allowed the pigeons to feed in the biologist's cornfield When I flushed them from the field, they were so stupid: they always flew

to the roof of his barn It was a slate roof; when I picked the careful not to shoot them in their crops--they slid down one side of the roof or the other One day, I shot a hole in the roof; after that, Mr Mayo-Set how his barn leaked The fruit flies in the drinking fountain were the school's probleist's very own barn--"Personal property, and all that that entails," asin Russian History

Shooting a hole in Mr Mayo-S than the years I spent in Language Therapy At Exeter, poor spelling was unknown--I mean that little was known about it It was nosis wasn't available in the late 1950s and early '60s--bad spelling like e therapist who evaluated e disability did not les at the acadee Therapy were judged to have had no discernible influence on ory" and "allergy," I was turned over to the school psychiatrist

Did I hate the school?

"No" (I had grown up at the school!)

Why did I refer to my stepfather as my "father"?

"Because I love him and he's the only father' I've ever known"

But as I "defensive" on the subject of other people calling my father my stepfather?

"Because I love him and he's the only 'father' I've ever knohy shouldn't I be 'defensive'?"

Why was I angry?

"Because I can't spell"

But why couldn't I spell?

"Search me"

Was it "difficult" having my stepfather--that is, my father--as a teacher?

"I had my father as a teacher for one year I've been at the school, and a bad speller, for five years"