Page 19 (2/2)

A hot wind ruffles the canvas u the lass table Someone had shoved a piece of paper between the pipe and the table, perhaps to keep it fro I reach over and remove the piece of paper My detective’s curiosity still alive, I begin unfolding it There is nothing written on it

“Eddie knows I’m sick,” I say The fact that Eddie hasn’t bothered to see me in two years is a source of some hurt for me

Nuers and eases back in his chair His iced coffee sits in front of hi condensation Numi looks ahen he says, “I told him he should speak with you anyway, cowboy”

I a forward takes ive So, I stay back in my bamboo chair and say, “Why would you tell him that?”

Nu at me He has taken my illness hardest of all No surprise there “Because you’re the only one who can help him, man, and you ain’t dead yet”

It’s not that Nuets that I’ve been diagnosed with an incurable AIDS-related cancer that has spread to iven sixon borrowed time It’s that my old friend is in some serious denial, and he only wishes it was a daypt

“True,” I say “I’m not dead yet”

I look at my coffee in front of me and I want to reach for it, but my shoulder hurts so much that I don’t want to move All I want to do is sit there and close my eyes and feel the hot sun onup and about The doc had insisted I stay in bed But I figure if I’ht as well do it with a latte in my hand

“Just talk to him, cowboy”

I look at Nuly white row of tiny bottom teeth I know this smile It is a new s, too unnatural, too patronizing, too euphoric It is a s my world to be safe As if ht siven it his best shot

I take in some air, which rattles around in my chest “Help him, how?”

Numi thinks it’s his sain, and this tiay, and I am not Lately, he has taken my hand a lot and I have let hith to pull it away And truth be known, I appreciate his co touch He is the only one who touchesof doctors Instinctively, I want to pull away, but I don’t He squeezes ives th

Nu”

Now, I do pull my hand away and sit up The effort alone causes a wave of dizziness that nearly overwhel in h it

After all, this is what I did years ago, before the sickness Before I was diagnosed with AIDS Before the cancer Before all of that, I found those ereI found them, one way or another Dead or alive

“Who’s ?” I ask

Numi shakes his head and then flicks his eyes overnow He can tell you”

CHAPTER TWO

A moment later, Eddie comes around and stands in front of randfather His lips are pressed together and he’s sort of sain, but clearly sad to see me in this current dilapidated state Mostly he’s unsure of how to react to me I’m used to it

He’s also a little standoffish, which I’ve also grown used to So of AIDS doesn’t elicit a lot of physical contact, although that doesn’t see stops Numi—at least, not when it comes to me