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Chapter 1

My best friend is trying to back out on me and I refuse to let it happen As we stand on the caymnasium, I try to talk sense to her

“This is a new start,” I reot to tryout for the cheerleading tea yourself to another four years of who you were in high school Besides, if you don’t go to tryouts, I’ to auditions”

Trishelle and I are friends fro to start fresh now that we’re in college Neither of us had successful high school experiences, but college is supposed to be different

We’re going to blossos that ere too scared to do back then

She’s supposed to go to cheerleading tryouts and I said I would go to acting auditions But nowto back out on her end of the deal

“Fine, Anna I guess I’ll go rees (thanks toto take no for an answer), taking a big breath and adjusting her shorts “Let’s just get this over with”

“That’s what I like to hear Sort of,” I say

We continue on to the gy in the center of ca froets her nuo stretch and me to sit in the bleachers with a collection of nervous e-dads who are so adorably freaked out that I can’t stand it

I sit alone— which is cool with o to restaurants, theaters, and, I suppose, cheerleading auditions by myself I’ve never understood why it worries soor anything, but I’ve never been uncomfortable by myself Maybe it’s a throwback to my childhood— kidney insufficiency means I spent a lot of time in hospital rooms alone despite the best intentions of nurses, other patients, and ht it a) left me with two insane scars and b) meant that someone had to, you know, die so I could have the transplant

A therapist once told me that’s part of the reason I’m so hyper-responsible and anti-risk; I feel like I owe it tofor theater and totally hu myself and—